A number of these signs have appeared at Ely Station. I believe we can all agree that the end is nigh. On the plus side, it means there's always a bench free in an absolute emergency.pic.twitter.com/u8PqMoSabO
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A number of these signs have appeared at Ely Station. I believe we can all agree that the end is nigh. On the plus side, it means there's always a bench free in an absolute emergency.pic.twitter.com/u8PqMoSabO
And if you find a pair give them back to Prince Harry
Just loan them to Harry, he only needs them once more!
After that you can sell them on eBay, Crown Jewels worth a fortune.
If you ask a policeman for directions they like to be called PC Plod
Get the next available train to York, Far friendlier and safer, and our Mayor is really nice to.
Oh Julia you are awful , but I like you .......
#dickemery
I love chatting to people on the tube when I visit, some people genuinely like it, most get freaked out lol
Dont forget to buy your Burkha
You are naughty... 
Tell them that the streets of London are completely safe and Law and order is the main priority of the London Mayor.pic.twitter.com/3AyYekdFHe
Get the next train to Windsor
Watch were you are walking, look up for knives and down for sh1t.
Better ssend him a list of walk in medical centres as well after that
Tee hee!
And you wouldn't want to make @Nigel_Farage feel uncomfortable by chatting to your friends in another language either
To deal with UK crime pack a gun. No need to declare it if you are coming from the USA;we expect it. Also take care to inform the bartender if your beer isn’t chilled. Book all 5 days of Test match - much better than baseball & remember ur welcome to camp overnight on the pitch.
Buy a stab vest
I spoke to a muslim woman in a lift last week. Broke all the rules 
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