This is a story of how one babe wanted to kill me with sexual enjoyment. Brothers, stay woke.Forget forming coitus Jagaban and Igodo part 1: conqueror of the evil forest.There are some babes you'll Jam, you sef go believe. Issa Thread
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I had not recovered 4rm dat 1 wen she said 'For dis to work, tell me. Are you sure? Really sure You're great in bed' Hei
dis babe has touched the tail of not one but two Lions. Me? A sexual Vuga. An intercoursal IGODO? Mr all Night Long? Kai see question
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I held her gaze for like 7mins instead of d 3mins she did. B4 speaking, i ensured my eye had changed to red [ her fada! All of us sabi form look]pic.twitter.com/hCJADA2flB
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Then I said something romantic, along the lines of I wanted her more than her body. Blah blah.yada yada But in my realest of real mind. I'm like U! Iwo! Ah! You wee see cameroon pepper. You wee smeh ya yanshpic.twitter.com/YarDQNU9gS
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We kissed Relationship started. I had tried to form let's not rush things so it won't look like the sex was what i was after. But sis showed up at my house one weather for 2 day like Destiny can be delayed not denied. Enough of this waiting.pic.twitter.com/yD9FJeq11o
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From kissing then came Bolaji aka B.J. she worked her black magic repete making me shed a tear like a child whose caprisonne they collected I too returned the favor and ate a full plate of Isiewu. Amem somebody? Emem Then it Began.pic.twitter.com/CxQpMl7UfR
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I knew there was problem wen smtin we started at 10, by 4am, afta i had cum abi arrived almost 3ce, i realised madam had not even left her bustop yet. To make matters worse, tired as I was, small touch here nd there she did, it rose again. Homaigot! What a betrayal penispic.twitter.com/a8Y7pguOop
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I was dying But babe kept riding me kpacha kpacha kpacha like those old ladies bicycle. To worsen things. Morning no gree reach. My village people ensured we had longer 9t shorter day, cos after wat seemed like 10hours of riding it was just 5.22 Kee me plixpic.twitter.com/8S0GM7XwHw
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Later when we switched positions, Aunty was shouting. I'm cumming, I'm coming 4 u baby' Meanwhile me In my mind I'm like aunty I'm Going o. Going going gone too soon I could my headstone clearly Here lies a man who died on Top[ nd world people will think i died a great man]
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Eventually somewhere close to 6am. We slept. More like she slept. While me I slept like Hei Gawd! I don leave dog go let the lion out. Correct simba and scar.pic.twitter.com/P004AH2mOO
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7am hand don begin touch me. Her mouth heading 4 my nether region to christen me Bolaji again. FUNKE! I shouted. And dis my people was my life 4 the next month. Day and 9t. I go lecture come back; sex Our eyes jam; We mekwe She hear se. B4 you complete it as seconds; mekwepic.twitter.com/vlOFCfvOnQ
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We go downstairs go buy something.when we return we congratulate ourself with sex. We dey wait for water for tea to boil. We wait with sex. Babe had excess energy,drive,zeal,passion and ambition for sex like who drink Alomo plus monkey tail, the shoulder, heart and kidney.pic.twitter.com/qgXE9nKgBu
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Omo i was slimming down. People will see me like, man this your final yr project is taking its toll on you oh. At a point i was even praying to see my period.maybe madam will free me I'm like lawd pls. Let this bucket/Drum pass over me. I'm someone's shild for gossakes.pic.twitter.com/wPvKuzTVrY
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Babe even came 1 day like boo let's spice things up. Let's take weed. I'm like see your patience ozokwor village aunty face. Ogun! Of spice kee you dia! Ordinary feels lyk who took Spanish fly. Now u wnt 2 add weed nd unleash d full spanish animal kingdom ba?pic.twitter.com/0pJjO0b2YT
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Wen I knew dis nonsense mst stop was wen we went 2 fellowship nd topic was fornication.Babe looked so remorseful My shock wen we got back nd babe was like boo, kitty's back needs scratching. Ahn! ahn! the word neva scratch kitty reach? Kitty wen just come from church?pic.twitter.com/0nnxPowrl2
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Afta a month and of everyday sex babe was finally leaving for school in a week My spirit man shouted a victorious cha cha cha igbo kwenu But before she left, She wanted to do it everywhere nd way.People style, doggy style nd believe me tortoise get style; she showed me
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Man! when she left for school, after a while, had to hit her with the it's not you it's me line.Even Jaguda get Oga. I cannot cum and go and kee myself. Also called Progress like guy 4 your full life no ever say you see my spec again. Tueh! Animal! If you ever try am eh
pic.twitter.com/Wu7PoGKcor
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The End. Thanks for reading. If you loved this RT and share. Find more humor threads in my favs and pinned tweet. More stories coming! Go to my profile and turn on Notifications. Compliments of the season, With Love Uncle Stephen.
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And oh! You can find my other hilarious thread herehttps://twitter.com/ItsUncleStephen/status/945717769005420544 …
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And Another one herehttps://twitter.com/ItsUncleStephen/status/947171433205194753 …
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Steveekeng@gmail.com
We liked each other. So kilonshele gan gan
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