A different iteration of myself probably could have fallen into this trap. I've had serious confidence & social anxiety issues in life, and my physique matches scarecrow arms with a spare tire middle. But you gotta grow in life.
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Doing hard shit, like giving people a chance, treating others well, learning new skills, or daring to be vulnerable will pay off with rewarding relationships (platonic or not).
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And you can't overlook the role toxic masculinity plays. Gotta cut that shit out of your life. You can't identify yourself over how much power you exert over people. That's not how relationships work.
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Relationships actually are a skill (and I mean family, friend, romantic, all kinds). It's not one anyone teaches you, but shit maybe we should teach relationships in school or something. The internet is all too happy to teach kids the wrong way.
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It definitely at least comes in part from a lack of self-awareness and empathy. I remember a co-worker once complaining that they had no friends and no one liked them. Uh, probably because in order to have friends, you need to also BE a friend a foreign concept to her.
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