If every incel somehow got a girlfriend, the net violence in the world would only go up. Because guys who think like this are violent to their girlfriends. It's not their singleness that's dangerous; it's the way they think about women.
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"Incel" was actually coined by a woman who ran a blog & semi-support group for people regardless of gender who were celibate but didn't want to be, and acknowledged that often it's about learning social skills (among other reasons). Then misogynists hijacked it & became men only.
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This is a thing that frustrates me. I’ve read how “incel” was also used and useful in the trans community. I can recall uses of the phrase “friend zone” that did not accuse women (but which were about the idea of self-presentation).
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I think there are many mentally ill or socially challenged people for whom it is useful to acknowledge some basic principles with or about. One is that they need to be attteactive and explicitly ask out people appropriately, which is hard.
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But explicitly asking questions is key to affirmative consent. Also: many people’s awkwardness or status (esp. financial class, trans, etc) can interfere with ability to form relationships. Relevant to not just dudes but disadvantaged PoC, single moms. Celibacy snowballs.
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Yes, trans or gender non-conforming ppl can have trouble finding partners even if they have good social skills, esp in small towns or remote areas, as can physically disabled, mentally ill, autistic, socially awkward or low self-esteem folks, or folks in tough situations. Not…
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everyone who is involuntarily celibate for long periods is misogynist or dangerous to partners, and all deserve to have a supportive community, just preferably not one that encourages hostility, objectification, and violence as the ones using "incel" label now so.
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From what I've read so far they do use the term volcel in their group vocabulary.
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It's a self identifying label that includes more than sex. I see your point in general.
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I'm not familiar with the term or suppised group claiming it. I only learned it because of the van attack.
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It seems you're familiar with that groups mindset. Do you have an opinion on what keeps them from rape? Do they get something from identifying as incel?
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Thank you. It seems the "group" in some form seeks attention just by self identifying and forming a community of it. I can see shy or emotionally undeveloped/damaged creating difficulty with relationships but not falling into mentality often. I'm going to research. Intriguing.
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Just FYI, a subset of
#Incels are straight transwo-men who have perforce ruled themselves out of the het female dating pool so they browbeat & guilt-trip young lesbians into agreeing to reconsider their sexuality to "accommodate" them. It's vicious and heartbreaking to witness.pic.twitter.com/ZIVPEXecWX
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I'm going to look this up but i want to understand what you're saying (and the forum conversation). So trans-women, born men who don't have bottom surgery? And they are manipulating young gay women into basically heterosexual sex? I'm sorry if I'm messing it up.
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Nail on the head head, mate. In a nutshell. Check out the screenshots here especially Part 4 https://terfisaslur.com/cotton-ceiling/ & the hashtags
#cottonceiling &#terfisaslur. I wasn't exaggerating. It's utterly violent, intimidating, gaslighting, homophobic, narcissistic coercive abuse
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Thanks again. Wow.
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