Watson

CW: Mental Health, Therapy, #detrans Thread: I remember right before I went to seek a gender therapist, my mental health was the lowest it had been in quite a while. Making it through shifts at work was impossible. I frequently called out due to depression. 1/?

When I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t even recognize myself anymore. It felt like my body wasn’t mine. That I was just inhabiting it. Then, I logged onto YouTube and stumbled upon my first FTM YouTuber. The first video I saw hit me like a truck. It felt so... relatable. 2/

So I watched more and more of those videos, and I related to it all. I was always one of the boys growing up. Even my male peers said that I’m basically a boy in a girls body. I was in so much pain, that the idea of me being trans seemed like an amazing discovery. 3/

So I set my appointment with the gender therapist. My mother was confused, but accompanied me to my first one. I told my therapist that I read online that you need a letter to get hormones if you have gender dysphoria, and we talked about my gender dysphoria. 4/

I saw her once a month for six months, and I mentioned my anxiety and depression to her. Told her about how I couldn’t get through work sometimes. She said that it was all probably connected to my gender dysphoria and when I transition, it’ll probably go away. 5/

I was so relieved! Finally, a solution. After six months, I got my diagnosis and a letter and I could finally have hormones. Things were amazing for a while. I looked forward to all the changes. I came to twitter for community. Little by little though, I noticed little signs. 6/