"Well he murdered someone... But! He waited till the light was green before crossing at the intersection. And y'know the saying... a little bit of innocence goes a long way if you're not a jaywalker!"
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He refers to crimes from which he benefits. Those “don’t count.”
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It's also hilariously more logically nuanced than I would expect from him.
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Parody accounts warning
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This is what I've always said about cruel and unusual punishment. It's cruel and unusual, not cruel or unusual. Go wild sentencing juries.
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Sentence cruelly, sentence often. That way it won’t be unusual.
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Obstruction is a felony so I guess that doesn't count.
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Chewbacca defense.
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Pretty sure Trump has a record of accomplishing both anyhow.
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