I think it's generally a good idea to exhibit behaviour you want your child to emulate as soon as possible.This is why I would say 'I'd like you to sit down, please' even as I was compelling my tantrumming toddler to sit down on the bus against her will because calmness & manners
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I think saying 'Shall we change your nappy?' is fine to let the child know their co-operation is wanted and give them the chance to give it (when old enough to understand,obv.' Problem is that most kids still in nappies when 'NO!' becomes their favourite word.
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Then the parent has to overrule them and say 'We need to change your nappy' and just do it. If this lady thinks kids will apply these early experiences to later life, this experience is likely to be 'The best thing to do is overrule 'no' and do it anyway.' Of course, this is nuts
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Kids don't learn it's ok to overrule people & take their pants off coz their parents compelled them to have their nappy changed. They learn that parents can overrule very young children in this way for a good reason but adults' wishes must be sought and respected coz autonomy.
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So, she either thinks parents should ask consent and then respect 'no' in which case their kids will probably get very sick, die or be taken away or she just hasn't thought this through and recognised that 'no' often has to be overruled in very young children.
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End of conversation
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Yes, I thought the outcry against her was a bit too... pat. Seemed to me like she was really just talking about getting into the habit of leaving a space for hearing your child's view. Though I understand temptation to lampoon the very idea. Pink hair doesn't help.
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SHE???!!!
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That would be child neglect in many countries. Does she live in Narnia perchance?
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