No jokes please, ladies present: ‘Lingerie’ Comment in Elevator Leads to Uproar Among Scholars https://www.chronicle.com/article/He-Makes-a-Joke-She-Isnt/243350/#.Wu_cS6KbQ_w.twitter … via @chronicle
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Im dunno if there was a back-and-forth ramping up until he said "frivolous" (eg that she rejected the communication breakdown apology). If she didn't know about the joke's background, then its reasonable to see probable machismo (tho it sounds like she refuses any alternative) -
1) Doesn't matter. Calling her complaint "frivolous" at any point in the exchange was overly generous. "Probable machismo" is not a crime, and even if it were there is no reading of what the man said that is reasonably that. Hyper sensitive harpy heard a gendered word, did
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2) not understand it, and assumed the worst. She is the one who should be apologizing, and the one whose future behaviour is chilled from the exchange. But instead, it will be the rest of humanity that changes, that becomes less human, to avoid conflict with the likes of her.
End of conversation
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You do realize your 1st example implies that the guy said "ladies' lingerie" because he had sex with her on the brain, right?