Your mother should be more open-minded. Then again, teacups seem to be hardasses about gravity.
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A table is not a table, it is just a sign of the table, and the fact you assembled an item claimed to be far from the conventional table that nonetheless signified the table merely shows that your table comes close to the pure essence of table.
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It would seem an ideal opportunity to put that postmodernism into practice and deconstruct the table.
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I have to agree with you mum




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All tables are a social construct
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Tell her it's a non-euclidean table: she'll be impressed by your new-found mastery of mathematics....
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So you created a masterpiece of abstract art I take it?
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One at every corner and underneath: how dull ... it would just stand there and hold things. Sheeezzz ....
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Thats a bit funny
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