The assumption that bad motivations on the part of men must underlies everything is what is so poisonous. If someone is having difficulty looking at you or chatting with you, I'd be inclined to first, try putting them at their ease and second, leaving them alone.
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We see a weird version of this in Lacanian psychoanalysis where women work on social connections and men are linear and goal-orientated, women emote & men systemise, women are open & men closed, women feel & men reason. (semiotic & symbolic)
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I'd really like to take all this stuff and remove the contradictory ideological moralising & pull out gender observations which have been being made consistently in various forms for hundreds & even thousands of years & show what evolutionary psychology has to say about them.
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This is not moral, no matter how much opponents say it is because it reinforces stereotypes. We're not going to lose stereotypes because they relate to an objective reality which humans won't stop noticing. We will just moralise about them in radically different ways forever.
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Unless we actually work on understanding human psychology & nature from a biological & evolutionary point of view. This is actually the best countermeasure to the negative aspect of stereotypes which is moralistic generalisation. The facts don't allow for generalisations.
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End of conversation
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