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HPluckrose's profile
Helen Pluckrose
Helen Pluckrose
Helen Pluckrose
@HPluckrose

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Helen Pluckrose

@HPluckrose

Editor @AreoMagazine Secular, liberal humanist. Mother. Doglover. Writing book about epistemology & ethics on the academic left Helen.pluckrose@areomagazine.com

London.
areomagazine.com/author/hpluckr…
Joined August 2011

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    1. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Feb 25

      Helen Pluckrose Retweeted DM Berger

      One does not need to think sexual relationships are trivial to think that non-sexual relationships are non-trivial. I have a very close circle of female friends & a smaller number of male friends whom I love & connect with on a mental & emotional and totally non-sexual level.https://twitter.com/DM_Berger/status/967560235148701696 …

      Helen Pluckrose added,

      DM Berger @DM_Berger
      Replying to @egonotis @HPluckrose
      And are you projecting your own values? You realize taking this tack commits you to the idea that sex is essentially trivial, and can have no depth or uniqueness and cannot elevate people in any major ways? I think you and Helen are perhaps trivializing sex.
      2 replies 2 retweets 10 likes
      Show this thread
    2. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Feb 25

      I have dated both men and women but I feel sorry for people who don't understand friendship separate to romantic/sexual connection. The vast majority of relationships a person has in their lives is non-sexual. We only have or want sex with a minority of people we bond with.

      1 reply 2 retweets 7 likes
      Show this thread
    3. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Feb 25

      I realise there could be a gender difference here and men could see more potential for a sexual element in their relationships with people of whichever sex they're attracted to than women do. The 'friend zone' suggests a difference in perceptions.

      1 reply 1 retweet 3 likes
      Show this thread
      Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Feb 25

      So often, 'friend zone' complaints come down to difference of perceptions in which a man is sad his romantic/sexual interest is not reciprocated and/or a woman feels hurt because she thought she had a friend but he 'was only after one thing.'

      3:17 AM - 25 Feb 2018
      • 1 Retweet
      • 5 Likes
      • Keiko KaiserKriss Richard Ste-Marie Regina🎃 BoyGeorgist🔰
      2 replies 1 retweet 5 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Keiko‏ @keikoinboston Feb 25
          Replying to @HPluckrose

          These sorts of miscommunications are the worst. A friend asked me to dinner for what I thought was meant to be a platonic dinner but later began to have suspicions he thought was a date. 1/

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        3. Keiko‏ @keikoinboston Feb 25
          Replying to @keikoinboston @HPluckrose

          After much waffling, I decided to clarify and said that I was happy to have dinner as long as he understood I was not dating. Turns out, he wanted a date and declined to have dinner with me if I wasn’t interested in dating him. 2/

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
        4. Keiko‏ @keikoinboston Feb 25
          Replying to @keikoinboston @HPluckrose

          I felt bad because he is trans and I’m sure that made dating a challenge, but friends pointed out to me that the smart thing for him to do would have been to have dinner with me anyway because why wouldn’t you want to be friends with me even if you can’t date me?? 3/

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        5. Keiko‏ @keikoinboston Feb 25
          Replying to @keikoinboston @HPluckrose

          I hadn’t thought about it that way but yes, why indeed? My friends find me perfectly lovely. To this day I have no idea if it was a case of sour grapes on his part, if he was mortified to have misread the situation, or if he decided I was transphobic for saying no. :( /end

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        6. End of conversation
        1. Kirbmarc‏ @kirbmarc Feb 25
          Replying to @HPluckrose

          More often that not it's due to a failure to communicate. If you're sexually attracted to someone you should be clear about that. Similarly if someone is sexually attracted to you but you aren't attracted to them it's best to make it clear. The problem is that this isn't easy.

          0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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