I used to argue that using 'TERF' for trans-exclusionary radical feminists was simply a value-free & accurate descriptor & not a slur. They can argue that they don't exclude trans ppl from feminism coz they include trans men but this misses the criticism.
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I have decided against using TERF to describe feminists with this attitude but refer to them as 'gender-critical feminists' and say why I think their views are wrong & their activism harmful (when it is) whilst defending their right not to believe in gender identity & say so.
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You can get in trouble with geographical differences too. In the UK 'Jap' is an innocent abbreviation for 'Japanese' (motorbike mags routinely use 'Jap bikes' for example), but in the US it's an 'offensive racial slur' apparently. Funnily enough, nobody minds it in Japan...
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