But I am because so much of it is framed in terms of commitment & sacrifice & compromise & partnership - two becoming as one.
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I find the idea of two becoming one & there being duties involved in this repellent. I like two to remain two & work stuff out between them.
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I think life-long commitment & sacrificing one's own personal fulfillment for someone else is appropriate for parent to child relationships.
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Not so much for adult to adult ones. It does often work out this way but I don't think it is a healthy foundation for a relationship.
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I like the idea of co-operation & mutual support between individuals who've chosen to live their lives together.
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This is conceptually different to compromise and mutually supportive *roles* which is often how I hear pro-marriage arguments framed.
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Eg, if Dave wanted to give up his job & train to do something he'd find more fulfilling in another country for a year...
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...I'd try to find a way to make that doable, financially, practically etc And he would do the same if I wanted to do something like that.
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Well, he did. He encouraged me to go back to university and offered to be sole bread-winner & do more child-care so I had time to study.
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And this seems to be absent from a lot of pro-marriage rhetoric which focuses on compromise & responsibilities & mutually supportive roles.
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End of conversation
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As one who has been happily married for 46 years it's just rhetoric. You have every right to be skeptical about what you hear
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