Yeah I'd define hate as the "I'm gonna rebel against your ideas and rules man. I am so cool." Which was mostly peer info. Most ideals stuck.
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My parents had clear, consistent, accountable morals that we were objectively (as possible) held to. Compared to my peers it felt oppressive
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I think we all do but mine are very liberal. Most rules relate to not harming others. & some basic responsibilities.
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She doesn't have to be atheist, sceptical, left-wing or humanist tho she actually is all of those things
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Also my parents did have My back when I was in the right. E.g. whenever I was bullied and protected myself, they always had my back
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So basically, I hated them for the petty shit but realized that they did a good job in the end. And the best they could.
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I hear you. I think I'd have reacted differently coz different nature.
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Yeah my parents had 7 kids too so much harder to have a focused approach. More like a shotgun...but it worked.
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I think I have a simpler approach. Do all the things you need to do. After that, be yourself, don't harm anyone else.
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But they also know that, above all others, I'm there as a shoulder to cry on. That no matter what around me is a safe space.
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My kids know that I will not be moved on things like "I said no." and "bedtime" and "look at me when I'm talking to you"
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