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HPluckrose's profile
Helen Pluckrose
Helen Pluckrose
Helen Pluckrose
@HPluckrose

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Helen Pluckrose

@HPluckrose

Editor @AreoMagazine Secular, liberal humanist. Mother. Doglover. Writing book about epistemology & ethics on the academic left Helen.pluckrose@areomagazine.com

London.
areomagazine.com/author/hpluckr…
Joined August 2011

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    Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

    Helen Pluckrose Retweeted Larry Ladd

    I see we're talking about emotional labour again. (Search without the 'u' if you want to see the worst of it. Americans are always that bit extra). But, essentially, it is this: https://twitter.com/LarryLadd1/status/1053699890650406912?s=19 … I used to be very scathing about this but I recently changed my mind.

    Helen Pluckrose added,

    Larry Ladd @LarryLadd1
    Learn about the costs of emotional labor and how it disproportionately affects women: https://gt-us.co/2yqljTi  pic.twitter.com/LvvLLZSUK8
    5:19 AM - 21 Oct 2018
    • 2 Retweets
    • 37 Likes
    • Bharath Reddy Stephanie Lahey Sally Griffin 🍂🎃👻Sam👻🎃🦇 Demon Genre Mondegreen Beth Haymond Regina🎃 🎃Freedom-of-Screech🦉 Get that done...
    9 replies 2 retweets 37 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        I didn't think that emotional labour was really any kind of a problem and more of a whine because women have the same power to decline to do excessive amounts of it as men do. Checking everyone is feeling OK, noticing if they're not, finding out what the problem is, listening etc

        2 replies 1 retweet 22 likes
        Show this thread
      3. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        I said I just didn't do a lot of this stuff and that this has always been fine and suggested that women who don't want to be constantly caring about how everyone is feeling should stop doing it. This would work better than blaming men for not doing it, especially as so subjective

        5 replies 1 retweet 35 likes
        Show this thread
      4. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        Then I did a year long project with three men & it all had to come to a head in a rush & everybody was very stressed & tense & I found that actually, the only person trying to make sure everybody was feeling OK & that we were all communicating & relationships were strong was me

        3 replies 1 retweet 27 likes
        Show this thread
      5. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        I suddenly really needed to make sure everyone was OK and that we were all properly bonded. I have to say it wasn't entirely clear that the others regarded this as a service on their behalf so much as an extra burden that perhaps I didn't need to be laying on them right now. XDpic.twitter.com/o3pb7J41gN

        1 reply 3 retweets 28 likes
        Show this thread
      6. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        Moral of the story. If you are doing loads of emotional labour for everybody else and feel it is unfair that men are not doing as much, check that you're not actually serving your own needs and everyone else wouldn't rather you gave it a rest & let them get on with work. XD

        8 replies 16 retweets 125 likes
        Show this thread
      7. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        The whole concept of emotional labour in this context really annoys me. It just feels so manipulative and whiny. You genuinely can just not do it. Even if people really do expect more from women, all it would take to change that would be for enough women not to do it & foil that.

        5 replies 3 retweets 51 likes
        Show this thread
      8. Helen Pluckrose‏ @HPluckrose Oct 21

        When it comes to things like being expected to remember everyone's birthday coz female, people can't hold that expectation for me for very long. I've been known to forget my own.

        5 replies 2 retweets 35 likes
        Show this thread
      9. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Auklet‏ @aukletqd Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        Perhaps I'm an unusual woman, but I find my female colleagues' insistence on caring for everyone's emotions tiresome. I want to get the job done, and expect others to manage their own feelings, and assert themselves when needed, like adults.

        2 replies 1 retweet 24 likes
      3. TheChainGang 🕶️‏ @CGAtheist Oct 21
        Replying to @aukletqd @HPluckrose

        If I could like this post twice I would.

        0 replies 1 retweet 5 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Sally Griffin‏ @jackylification Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        I’ve always found women the most difficult regarding this. It comes up every so often that a friend deems me or someone else a bad friend because we ‘dont care’ about them. That is, our lives don’t revolve around their constant upsets 24/7 it’s exhausting.

        2 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
      3. Designated Protagonist‏ @ringtrick Oct 21
        Replying to @jackylification @HPluckrose

        Her: But I'm doing all this emotional labor towards our friendship Me: Please take an indefinite leave of emotional absence

        0 replies 1 retweet 7 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Jay Besser‏ @bessertkj Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        @JamesADamore women rate higher in neuroticism. Women: No we don't! We just have more emotional labor!

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Nigel MacDugong‏ @macdugong Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        I just wish there was another word for it, since it was coined by sex workers for the specific bit of our job that is performing compulsory emotional/management stuff. Seeing it taken out of the context of work and into personal relations lessens our ability to talk about that.

        2 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
      3. Christian Bailey‏ @chrispbbailey Oct 21
        Replying to @macdugong @HPluckrose

        No it doesn’t. You’re doing it right now

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Nigel MacDugong‏ @macdugong Oct 21
        Replying to @chrispbbailey @HPluckrose

        But instead of being able to say two words, we have to clarify, which ends in arguments about how it's wrong to make a distinction (usually from women not in SW saying that we can't possibly have different pressures on us) . If you've got a solution to that though, I'm all ears.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1. Julia‏ @juliadakron Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        I believe it's bio-determined for chicks to do this; stems from need to ensure co-cave-dwellers are cooperative/safe. But we must learn 2 apply intelligence/awareness or we get all mother-henish/controlling. Emo labor unneeded in most modern work enviros.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. mauricetfrank‏ @mauricetfrank Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        Yeah, and men are expected to do the physical labour. Also not always fun. Boo boo.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Sono Tom, QF'D‏ @SonorTy Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        Sono Tom, QF'D Retweeted Helen Pluckrose

        a trend of women shirking all natural contribution to society apparently leads to an end with all take, and no give.https://twitter.com/HPluckrose/status/1053984023595401216 …

        Sono Tom, QF'D added,

        Helen Pluckrose @HPluckrose
        I see we're talking about emotional labour again. (Search without the 'u' if you want to see the worst of it. Americans are always that bit extra). But, essentially, it is this: https://twitter.com/LarryLadd1/status/1053699890650406912?s=19 … I used to be very scathing about this but I recently changed my mind.
        Show this thread
        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Sono Tom, QF'D‏ @SonorTy Oct 21
        Replying to @SonorTy @HPluckrose

        women cannot and will not do the protecting, providing and building for men.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Jay & Violent Mob, Insert Tribal Identity Here‏ @JAndViolentMob Oct 21
        Replying to @HPluckrose

        👀

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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