About being asked to smile by unknown men. This does happen. However, I'm wary of putting it in a category of its own & making it a symptom of an imbalance. Where does it rate on the scale of minor annoyances of being in a public place? Do women also start unwanted conversations?https://twitter.com/quellist1/status/1050438633298305025 …
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Do we find this less intrusive because it is almost certainly not a precursor to anything romantic or sexual but just a wish for conversation and connection? Does it change when the man talking to you is clearly lonely. Elderly men on park benches waiting for someone to talk to?
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Also, going higher up the thread you linked, I think people underestimate how much fear guys have when they go out by themselves because most guys won't admit it. I've been jumped and slammed with a baseball bat. I've been robbed at gunpoint twice in my life. I have some fear.
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Jesus! Do you spend a lot of time in biker/mafia bars? I spent years drunk and under the influence of various substances in dive bars and never had anything like this happen. I think a guy tried to rob me in Antigua, but he was 1/2 my size.
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I think I just went out a lot at night. And not in the best areas.
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But my anecdotes aside, it's worth pointing out that men are statistically *very* likely to be victims of violence so if they don't have fear of it, that's probably unreasonable and might speak more to the gender role's value for stoicism than anything.
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Yes, even though nothing like that has happened to me, I'm still acutely aware of my surroundings and potential threats at night.
End of conversation
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And in waiting rooms and on airplanes. I immediately open a book in these settings. Granted this is anecdotal, but more men than women seem to understand that reading means I want to be left alone.
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We need more women like you in the humanities. Just broadening the picture is such an unusual act for those in the humanities this days. They are good academics but really bad scientists. They just know the academic game a bit too well.
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It me. I guess we can’t be friends, Helen. *dumps out my attempt at tea for two*
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