Just to clear up any confusion: I'm not here to delegitimize men's struggles. I'm just hoping that we can finally start legitimizing women's. Regardless of what you've decided about me, I'm not "anti-men". I am, however, super "pro-women". You should be too.
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We barely notice as we’ve been taught that’s how life is. My mom used to say it’s wrong you can’t run by yourself at night. But it’s still not safe.
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It depends where you live! You're still more likely to be attacked if you are a man tho, wherever you are. But I regularly walk by myself at night and go through London by myself at night. You can't stop living just in case you encounter a criminal. Well you can but what a waste.
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89% of the perpetrators of violent assault are Male. So saying they're more likely to be violently assaulted does not negate their responsibility. They obviously need to be better to eachother as well! (Not all men obviously!)
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This is sloppy thinking. Sorry - I know your heart is is the right place.
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It may not be an overwhelming fear at all times; but I think most women live their lives with safety plans built in, because we have to. Men generally do not.
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You are wrong, men are constantly evaluating other men (and sometimes women), and cars and objects around them for being potential threats
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I don’t think it’s so much raw fear/violent assault as a general low background grind of men feeling generally empowered to intrude on a woman’s personal space (groping, cat-calls, inappropriate comments, demeaning attitude) in a way they simply wouldn’t with another man.
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Eg - No-one has ever come up to me and said “smile darling- it may never happen” like they know me and are entitled to the intimacy. Maybe there are women it’s never happened to as well, but if I have never so far met them.
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Tell me, does that really happen to the women you know? I sometimes feel like I must live on another planet because these phrases like the "smile" thing.... none of the women I know and have spoken to know what hell I am even talking about. They look back at me blankly.
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I’ve never been told to smile before (other than in photos) but perhaps that’s because I’m a constant smiler and nervous giggler. Who knows.
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Yeh - work colleagues. You really are missing (or ignoring) the point. How many total strangers in the street feel entitled to call it out to you as you pass?
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None. Not to me. My wife. Other women I know. Other men I know. This was why I asked where you lived?
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Then you know a remarkable (and very lucky) group of women. I cannot think of a single woman I’ve met anywhere in the world who hasn’t been on the receiving end of this kind of unwanted intrusion at one time or another.
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Thank you. All these precautions, out late alone, afraid of people following you, I take them too. And I am a man. This is just common sense. Of course when you are the criminal, you will probably feel safer. The difference is not gender, but criminal intent.
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And things between men escalate quicker, simply because there is more strength involved, so it usually takes more to overpower a man which leads to overkill. Often times my wife is much less fearful than myself to be honest when we are walking together alone somewhere.
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