GlennyRodge

@GlennyRodge

Screenwriter, comedian, actor, socialist and model. These are words. As are custard, trumpet, wardrobe, trousers and dandelion.

Vrijeme pridruživanja: siječanj 2010.
Rođen/a 29. ožujka

Tweetovi

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    7. velj 2016.

    Here's a collection of my favourite tweets. Hope you like them.

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 5 sati
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  3. prije 5 sati

    I've been sitting awkwardly on this pile of French bread and Chinese food for so long now that it's starting to give me pains and noodles.

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  4. prije 6 sati

    My grandad sat behind U2 at the BAFTAs yesterday. He was really enjoying it until he did a really large sneeze. His teeth were on edge for the rest of the evening.

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    9. stu 2019.

    “if it wasn’t for me, you lot would be speaking german now” I said to my friends, with the key to the german classroom hidden in my pocket.

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    8. sij

    Doctor: this might hurt a little bit, ok? Me: ok, I'm ready Doctor: your family and friends find you annoying in more than small doses

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    22. lip 2019.

    “Forgive me, I’m a terrible flort” “Don’t you mean flirt?” *starts florting* “OMFG. WTF is that?!”

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  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 12 sati

    Crocodile Dundee: you call that a knife? me: yes Dundee: what do you call this? me: a fork

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    22. stu 2018.

    Me: I'm an expert at identifying birds Her: OK, what about those ones flying over that tree? Me: Yup, they're all birds

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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 13 sati

    mugger: act cool and you wont get hurt me: *two thumbs up* Eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy mugger: you know what, here's your wallet back

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. sij

    Just written a film about a theatre owner who thinks he's booked Tina Turner but it turns out it’s actually a tin of tuna. Well, I say film, it's more a tweet really.

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  12. prije 8 sati

    Really poor turnout at Named After An Ice Cream Club last night. Just Juan Cornetto.

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    28. kol 2017.

    Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, I'm begging of you, get your f***ing ears tested

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    1. ožu 2017.

    Accidentally just knocked a lady over in Dominos Pizza. Well, I say one...

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    29. lis 2019.

    GLINDA: Are you a good witch or a bad witch? DOROTHY: I’m not a witch at all! Witches are old and ugly. GLINDA: Only bad witches are ugly. DOROTHY: GLINDA: DOROTHY: You literally just asked if I was a bad witch.

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  16. prije 11 sati

    Got a rash on my face in the shape of a roadrunner. I think I might have acme.

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  17. prije 11 sati

    So proud. After huge amounts of stress, hard work & self-doubt, I finally finished my first novel. Think I might read another one.

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  18. prije 11 sati

    News reporters who are only now, 3 1/2 years on, challenging members of the public on why they voted leave and finding they have no real valid reason whatsoever (or at least one that makes any sort of sense), I dunno, forgive me, but is it not a bit TOO F***ING LATE FOR THAT NOW?

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    The first rule of Pop Music Club is you never talk about Pop Music, talk about, pop music, shoobie doobie do wop, pop pop shoo wop Club.

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  20. 2. velj

    - My girlfriend got cleaned up so she could watch those film awards. - BAFTA? - No she showered herself. *music plays* *gets ushered off*

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  21. 2. velj

    GF is looking for her concealer. Yeah, good luck with that.

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