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So if you say that "negative self-talk can be good, as long as it can be relied to stop when it gets too bad", then that counts as using non-coercive motivation to me, since you are cooperating with the self-talk rather than being coerced by it.
I don't really have a working definition of non-coercion, but the negative self-talk that worked for me consisted of me basically shouting at myself to stop being lazy and do some fucking work, which certainly felt a bit coercive?
I was pushing myself into something I didn't want to do by using forceful emotions. The level of coercion was bounded in that I would stop if it were truly harmful, but it was definitely an overriding of internal motivational structure.
But honestly I feel like the lack of working definition is part of the problem. Every time someone points out that actually coercion can be good, noncoercion twitter is like "But that's not coercion!!!", but you sure wouldn't know they didn't think it was coercion from advocacy.
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