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If you demand perfection from a bunch of people who haven't learned to socially function yet, you're not actually helping them get better, you're just asking them to go away and die quietly somewhere they won't bother you.
Similarly, if you condemn people for having been members of these imperfect communities in the past, you're not actually helping you're just demonising people for coping with their problems as best as they knew how with the resources available to them at the time.
This also ties in with what I was explaining in https://twitter.com/GeniesLoki/status/1316118376251621376 … People who have been through this sort of process are often going to be sensitive to the kind of language that was used against them.
The way a lot of SJ talks about people's imperfect strategies is very much a tone of "If I were you, I simply wouldn't have these problems in the first place". It's precisely the request to go away and die quietly.
I'm firmly on team "Patriarchy hurts men too", but honestly it's *incredibly* unsurprising that when you say that a lot of men who have struggled to fit in look for the dagger you're hiding behind your back while you're saying that.
Also, honestly, some of this is intrinsic in the theory and is not just its misapplication. The theory could and should be extended rather than abandoned, but the problems really are there right in its core.
I talked about The Scott Aaronson Incident in https://twitter.com/GeniesLoki/status/1316123830721671169 … Honestly I didn't care about 95% of the backlash it was very business as normal the response that enraged me the most was the supposedly empathetic one.
"I'm sorry you're hurting but that's not the same as structural oppression" is a hell of a thing to say to a group of people who share a common set of traits that cause them to be systematically shunned and demonised because they've not learned to cope with things society demands
Feminism really does have a problem with systematically rejecting the places where the theory naturally could and should be extended to men, and the way it treats groups like this who have male-coded problems (and are also majority but not exclusively men) really brings it out.
If you don't believe me try saying "female privilege" to your average feminist and see how they react. Privilege is a really useful framework for looking at a bunch of problems that men face that women don't. It's perfectly possible for both male and female privilege to exist.
I am apparently grouchy this morning and this topic brings that out extra hard.
Yes I'm aware that this is the most genteel version of hitting the roof you're likely to see on the twitternet. Some of us overcorrected when we finally learned to socialise, OK?
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