GeniesLoki

For example your traditional heterosexual relationship implicit contract is basically a division of labour, with each side taking care of the other in slightly different ways. (Which is not to say everyone is *good* at this, but best case scenario this is how it works)

But then you've got a bunch of feminist theory pointing out that many of the burdens placed on the woman in this scenario are unreasonable. Fair enough. This is true. BUT this really was two sides in the original format. Unequal maybe, but still two sided.

And if you don't address both sides, what you end up with is men believing: 1. It is inappropriate for me to expect my partner to take care of me (feminism). 2. It is my duty to take care of my partner (patriarchy). This is not a fun set of beliefs to hold.

"a division of labour, with each side taking care of the other in slightly different ways" - what kind of labour are you talking about here? Like mainly emotional support type stuff or more division of housework?

I was thinking specifically emotional support, but also varieties of life admin and shared responsibilities and such. Housework is a part of this but I think is an area best solved by men sorting their shit out and sharing labour equally (not straightforward, but doable)

Huh I honestly don't have a model in my mind of what this traditional division of emotional labour is/was. So you think male feminists are starting to feel it's wrong for them to go to their partner for emotional support?

Broadly speaking I think the traditional division on a lot of things (including emotional labour) is "The man provides stability by absorbing risk, the woman provides day to day maintenance". Somewhat related.https://twitter.com/GeniesLoki/status/1298197746046971910 …

And yeah I think there's a significant problem where (on both sides really) feminists feel like a man getting emotional support from a female partner is somehow bad, but not vice versa. And yeah, there's 100% bad versions of this. Really bad. But some amount of it is vital.