Relationship* tool: When you are having Complicated Feelings about someone, start a document titled "Things I want to say to (name)" and write down what you would say to them if you trusted them completely. * Doesn't have to be a romantic one, though some mostly useful if close.
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If you are feeling exceptionally brave and can rely on them to not freak, you can actually share it with them, but even if you don't share it having articulated the thoughts is helpful, and may lead to you being able to talk to them about more of it than you otherwise would have.
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(I used this recently with a friend. We'd laid a lot of groundwork already so I just said "fuck it" and shared the whole thing. It went very well. They are in turn using it with their partner and are quite sensibly not sharing it but just using it as a journaling tool)
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Replying to @GeniesLoki
I use draft emails without the recipient field filled in for this to good effect. When it has failed me, the mode has been sharing too much, too soon. So my present heuristic is more “would take it in the spirit in which it’s intended, ideally with joy” than “won’t freak out.”
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