But in scenario (2) it usually indicates an underlying need/fear that it's worth talking about? The goal is to not have those, but responding to them badly will make them worse and it's better to just say "I'm sorry you felt you had to hide that" and work on the underlying fear.
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I've gotta be honest I think the reason you've never seen it elsewhere is because you're mostly listening to men and I do good translation.
Which is not to downplay it, but 50+% of this is just that I read a lot of books and then I put what they say into practice and I explain what I learned from that combination.
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Yea, i believe that but something something filter via actual experience from 'my side' as it were, comes different in a way that i think is partially unjustified but partially justified too
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Yeah I don't mean to downplay the value of the translation, and I think I do also synthesise a bunch of different sources who don't normally talk to each other that well. But ultimately nothing I say on this front is particularly original to me except synthesis and framing.
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