I think this is a good example of it depending on what "should" means. I think the correct position here is roughly "Here are the benefits you would experience from not being fat. I will support your change if you decide that's worth it, and accept your decision if you don't."
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I'm pretty sure this isn't what I'm doing, given that most of my thoughts on the subject of emotions were built up in the course of doing some pretty heavy and successful work on getting better at them?
I'm not making some deep philosophical point here, I'm saying that projecting your preferences onto other people is a jerk move.
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the only way to understand the world is through projection! the inner and outer are one! you cannot possibly understand something except as a shard of yourself!
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OK. In that case, figure out how to project in a way that stops you from being a jerk to the parts of yourself that are also other people whose autonomy you should be respecting.
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