GeniesLoki

Update: when I introspected into my body, I found a *ton* of anger boiling there, shouting to be heard. I nearly failed trusting it enough to let it flow into my body, but finally I succeeded; I expressed it physically, and feel *much* better now. The anxiety is nearly gone.https://twitter.com/Elodes12/status/1309594278310617088 …

This sounds like an Enneagram 5-8 blockage. I have much the same issue myself, and I'm looking to see how people tackle getting unblocked on it. @GeniesLoki and @Virtual1nstinct are 5-8s and I've got on them.

Things that seem to work for me are 1. It's much easier to learn anger in defence of others. 2. Cultivation of a sense of deep trust in one's own competence, ethics, and judgement. 3. Learning to express and acknowledge one's own needs as legitimate.

I think I have 2 and 3 mostly down (though 3 -- sovereignty for me -- was something I'd been missing for a long time). 1 is an amazing tip. But man, that's tough; who would I defend? Almost everyone I want to defend is like me in some way; most others get defended enough, imo.

There's a hack that works pretty well if you can pull it off: You defend others by defending yourself, because in doing so you model the behaviour that you want everyone to feel free to adopt.