Everyone is wrong about mansplaining and it's very annoying. Mansplaining is a failure to negotiate a common conversation protocol, resulting in an annoying mismatch. This can be due to sexism but it isn't necessarily so.
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On the one hand, I may be off base because I find it hard NOT to blame myself for everything. On the other hand, if a lot of people complain about being patronised at, I assume they're probably right unless there's clear indication that the explainer actually wasn't patronising
IDK I see people getting mad at each other over simple miscommunications causing them to read bad intent from the other party so incredibly often that it doesn't seem like a weird complicated theory so much as the default explanation.
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Like yeah, arseholes exist, and aren't super rare. "That person was an arsehole" is a reasonable explanation, but "I keep encountering this arsehole behaviour over and over again" should always look pretty fishy and invites further explanation.
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Yeah, I agree that happens too. I guess I'm thinking, when I've seen things described as mansplaining, most sounded like, "he assumed she wouldn't be competent at that and didn't have any way of updating his assumptions" and only a few sounded unfortunate but nonmalicious.
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But that's based mostly on second hand descriptions, I don't know how representative it is. I certainly think any term that's got popular as something to complain about, some people will latch on to when describing something whether it fits or not (both understandably and not)
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