I think about this a lot, really. I feel like our basic model of therapy is entirely wrong, and treating it as a thing that individuals can do to fix themselves both ignores most of its benefits and limits the ability of the individual to actually change.https://twitter.com/GeniesLoki/status/1300736048432140291 …
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Most therapy should be group therapy with friends.
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Replying to @GeniesLoki
i'd think of therapy as a place where you can bootstrap one (1) normal, empathetic, supportive relationship, which enables you to build the skills to get things like friends (ie. people you have normal, empathetic, supportive relationships with, not just people you hang out with)
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Replying to @owohundro @GeniesLoki
I would question that. Therapeutic relationship is very much not a normal relationship. - you only have it as long as you pay for it - support is single-sided and you know little about them - they won't socialise with you outside of the therapeutic context
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Replying to @fvathynevgl @owohundro
I think a lot of therapists / styles of therapy do believe that the therapy relationship is supposed to work like this. I couldn't stand that, for all the reasons you list, and it's part of why I stopped therapy and decided to work on it myself and with actual friends.
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Replying to @fvathynevgl @owohundro
Uh, that the therapy relationship is about genuine healthy human connection and the relationship between the therapist and the patient, rather than a professional transaction in which you are paying the therapist to help you sort yourself out.
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Why do those have to be mutually exclusive? Does the professional transaction negate the possibility of a genuine connection (albeit one that exists in a bounded space)?
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They don't have to be mutually exclusive but there's a mix of Berkson's paradox (it's hard to be good at either, and people don't become therapists if they're good at neither, so among therapists two are negatively correlated) and genuine competition for time and energy going on.
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on whether therapy helps at the individual level at all - I think it's much more useful to have a whole bunch of therapy skills in the water in a community than therapy is for individuals themselves.