Do you have any men with whom you could practice shouting at each other as a desensitisation practice / safe environment to practice skills around your response?
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Replying to @RoqaVuk
Hmm. Possible smaller variations on the same idea: * Practice with a woman. * Practice with a man shouting but not in anger or at you, just making a loud noise * Practice *you* shouting (initially on your own, then at someone else?) * ...in anger
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Replying to @RoqaVuk
Could you like... watch clips of shouty drill sergeants in movies or something?
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Replying to @GeniesLoki @RoqaVuk
lisatomic Retweeted Dingle Very
If you want, here’s one that was triggering to me along these lines:https://twitter.com/dinglevery/status/1296969572814209024 …
lisatomic added,
Dingle Very @dingleveryReplying to @QiaochuYuan @__justplaying and 5 othersApologies for the necro but I think this belongs here and wanted to be able to find it find later. Masculine af, almost absurdly so, but so compelling somehow. Watching it makes me feel both uncomfortable and intrigued, don’t know what to make of it. https://twitter.com/visakanv/status/1296946244720275456 …0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes -
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Replying to @RoqaVuk @GeniesLoki
This did ~help me, I think. I had the fear response in the first 10 seconds or so, but then could kind of see what had happened, see the guy’s sorta-anger in a way that wasn’t triggering, then rewatch the video. Unlikely that I could have done that IRL/ in real time though...
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Replying to @lisatomic5 @RoqaVuk
I kinda feel like IRL/in real time is such a hard mode version of this that chipping away at the edges with easier versions like video is needed before it becomes approachable.
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Like, angry shouty men are in some sense intrinsically scary because there's an actual plausible threat. I find angry shouty men difficult to deal with too and I don't have anything like this sort of trigger.
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Replying to @RoqaVuk @lisatomic5
Hm, interesting. Ugh, I almost hate suggesting this because of how cliche it is, but is your father a particularly shouty person?
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End of conversation
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