slowly realizing how much not being horny forces me to be only an observer and not a participant in the world
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It's only somewhat related, but have you read https://geniesloki.wordpress.com/2020/02/04/dating-advice-for-guys/ … ? I'm sortof assuming from the question that you're single. If you're not, post might be useful anyway. It's much easier to become hornier if partnered or believing in the possibility of becoming so.
But roughly in my experience there are two things that stopped me from becoming hornier: 1. It didn't feel especially useful. 2. It felt bad / inappropriate.
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On (2) I'd basically internalised a lot of stuff along the lines of "being attracted to people is bad", on (1) there was a certain level of... there didn't seem to be much point? Like what was horniness instrumentally for if I wasn't likely to be having sex anyway?
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So basically the route out was to a) Uncover and clear out a lot of emotional garbage that was preventing me from experiencing or expressing attraction to people and then b) Internalise the idea that attraction / horniness was to be rewarded.
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