oh yeah in that case i fully agree
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Replying to @__justplaying @GeniesLoki
online discourse, in general is becoming more and more abusive and vicious, unfortunately
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Replying to @__justplaying @GeniesLoki
and i think at the core of all this is two things 1. people think what they're doing is not abusive 2. people feel that the abuse is justified
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Replying to @__justplaying @GeniesLoki
3. people are really good at lying themselves saying what they're doing is not abusive/justified
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Replying to @__justplaying @GeniesLoki
which is to say, as the NYT and others so aptly put it a while back: everything is gamergate now
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Replying to @__justplaying
My working theory is something along the lines of: 1. People think conflict justifies abuse when it's "punching up" 2. People think that broad commentary directed at a privileged group is intrinsically punching up.
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Replying to @GeniesLoki @__justplaying
I can sortof buy (1) in some special cases. e.g. I think there are a lot of cases of legitimate power struggle where many things I'd otherwise consider not OK become if not ideal at least justifiable. (2) is just false though.
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Replying to @__justplaying @GeniesLoki
here's the thing though: i don't really know the solution. like, i can talk hours about all this and i've done it and still am happy to but at the end me and whoever i'm talking with always arrive at the same conclusion: discourse is utterly broken and we don't know the fix.
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Replying to @__justplaying @GeniesLoki
and that, is what's really frustrating me about all this.
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I'm just naively trying to talk about the problem and surfacing what I think are under-appreciated points of view from the men's side of things and hoping it helps a bit. It's not going to change the discourse, but it might at least change a few minds.
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Replying to @GeniesLoki
yeah no i think that's extremely valuable and i think you're doing a genuinely good thing here, we need more of this. truly men need to speak up about this, however we can, if only through our alts because of the nature of, well, the discourse.
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Replying to @__justplaying
I have had some luck talking about masculinity specific issues on main too, but it has to be a lot more "patriarchy hurts men too" and a lot less "you, yes you, are also complicit in this problem"
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