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Unfortunately because the frame that people have adopted in order to get the rights and treatment they need is one which treats these things as intrinsic objective true immutable aspects of your identity, that can be tricky to navigate.
Generally one-on-one people are absolutely fine about this (if a bit sceptical), but talking about it in public is hard.
What's the outcome you hope for in discussing it more widely? (not intended as a leading question even if it sounds like one)
Mostly: 1. Having other people to discuss my situation with helps me because I get their perspective on it and more clearly explain mine. 2. Probably at least some other people are in the same boat as me and would like to know they're not alone and benefit from (1)
and there's your solution - avoid the subject in situations where it just puts everyone on the defensive
"shut up and don't talk about the thing that is important to you in public" isn't actually a good solution though
Do you mean that your levels of these traits, while comparable to others’ levels, have different effects on your life b/c of how they interact with other factors in your personality/experiences? If so, what kind of evidence makes you think that?
Also, I wonder how much this more situational view of these labels (as opposed to the intrinsic/immutable view) threatens the rights and fair treatment of trans/ADHD/etc identifiers. Sadly, maybe many people won’t take those labels seriously w/o these clear-cut distinctions 
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