GeniesLoki

It's interesting how poly people get talked about. I'm particularly intrigued by how the genre of monogamous people going "Poly people are so mean about monogamy" is totally fine in circles where straight people would absolutely never get away with the same RE queer people.

Poly seems to get treated as this uber privileged thing, but the reality is that most people are *way* less willing to come out to their families as poly than queer, and with some reason - the worst coming out story in my circles in recent history was a straight poly person.

Besides, there's a huge overlap between the two categories. You can't really even consider poly culture without also considering queer culture.

The poly stereotype that tends to get criticised as the central example of poly is the straight guy who wants to bang lots of women, but honestly unless they're super hot straight men get the worst deal out of poly. Poly culture mostly works best for women and queer people.

Can you elaborate on this, re: the worst deal, or how it works best for women? I think I probably agree here, but it depends on what metrics you have in mind (# sex partners, ease of dating, quality of relationships, etc)

It's mostly two things: 1) Effective poly requires a lot of talking about feelings and (on average) straight men are very bad at this. 2) "Men approach women" norms tend to be replicated in poly circles in a way that creates significant difference in ease of dating.