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FilmCritHULK's profile
Film Crit Hulk
Film Crit Hulk
Film Crit Hulk
@FilmCritHULK

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Film Crit Hulk

@FilmCritHULK

Writing essays! Patreoning. Bylines at Polygon. Observer. Vulture. Verge. EW. New Yorker. Playboy. Thrilllist. Contact: filmcrithulk@gmail.com

Avengers HQ
patreon.com/filmcrithulk
Joined May 2010

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    1. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      I want to tell little story about adulthood, iron walls, and Chewbacca.

      12 replies 185 retweets 537 likes
      Show this thread
    2. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      I grew up an obsessive Star Wars fan. Not just the movies, I could tell you the inner details of Slave I AND Slave II. I could tell you how Bossk's concussion rifle worked. I could talk about EU planets, lore, games, books, as it was an entire world that I loved to play in.

      1 reply 3 retweets 86 likes
      Show this thread
    3. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      Then when I was older and awaited episode one, suddenly this dorky thing I'd been tucking into a corner of selfhood was going to come into the pop culture lexicon once again. I was ecstatic. Beyond elated. And then when the prequels came out... oof.

      1 reply 2 retweets 67 likes
      Show this thread
    4. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      It was not some sudden thing, mind you, nor built around anger, I just suffered this slow, sad death of my connection to Star Wars. Not just in terms of fervor and passion. But the very meaning of it. And I was growing past it. Which was healthy in many ways.

      1 reply 3 retweets 82 likes
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    5. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      But the true death knell came when the Disney buy-out took the commercialism nuclear, doubling down on the constant parade and episode 7. I finally felt so truly divorced from it, but it was more complicated than that.

      1 reply 2 retweets 70 likes
      Show this thread
    6. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      Because it's always weird thing to emotionally navigate: that pageantry for something that was once your everything but now makes you feel nothing. It's akin to the feeling I get looking at modern Simpsons and Weezer. But it's really the sad disconnect of growing up.

      2 replies 7 retweets 128 likes
      Show this thread
    7. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      Which brings us to the actual story: I went with a friend to Disneyland yesterday. We were just walking around that building with the star wars props in it and she went: "Oooh, Do you want to meet chewie?" I laughed, "Sure, why not?" and we went in.

      1 reply 4 retweets 62 likes
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    8. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      I've done these sorts of things as Disneyland before. It's a lark. Something cute and fun and always feels like fun dress-up where an actor hams it up for this working gig. And I love kids who freak out, thinking it's real. So it's not "for" me, but I get a kick out of it.

      1 reply 2 retweets 59 likes
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    9. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      Or thought it was. Because as we go through the line, we end up coming to the corner of this hall that turns into a surprisingly small and intimate room, and suddenly there's this weird moment of drama and I can't see the actor around the bend, but I know he's there...

      2 replies 4 retweets 62 likes
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    10. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      Then he came around the corner right near us. I didn't think about the quality of the illusion, or go "oh that's a really good costume." It was just like, "oh, I'm in this room with Chewbacca."

      2 replies 6 retweets 102 likes
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      Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

      Chewie immediately smiled put his hand on my shoulder with such outrageous kindness and suddenly I felt this intense wave of relief. My eyes started watering... I looked down at my friend and saw her on edge of tears and, well, there I went also crying.

      12:45 PM - 16 Feb 2018
      • 6 Retweets
      • 156 Likes
      • jjm3105 Wukong_Sugimoto shutting down. Adnan Kasujja Chad dies on his Hill Ambrose Reed The Puzzle Dipshit Daniel The Antifa Supersoldier Zoyd Dweller
      3 replies 6 retweets 156 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          And so we hugged and hugged and Chewie and I found myself having this intensely emotional moment. I have no idea how long it lasted. Probably a few seconds. But it was intense,my body went flush, I was sweating, and it was surreal.

          1 reply 3 retweets 142 likes
          Show this thread
        3. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          But please understand. This is not about me rekindling my connection to Star Wars. Nor is this about how The Last Jedi also recaptured some of these same feelings (note: if you try to turn this into an argument of that movie i will block you) It's not even really about Star Wars.

          1 reply 3 retweets 147 likes
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        4. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          It was the realization that I had been walking around wearing 100 pounds of emotional armor and suddenly they just slinked off for a second. It was the realization that in that moment, in this place in my life, I really, really needed a hug and somehow Chewbacca "knew" that.

          3 replies 13 retweets 227 likes
          Show this thread
        5. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          Which means this is really about the push-pull of our emotional selves. For there are many who would take this story and make an argument of how it's proof that we need to hold onto our sense of childlike glee and seek out the experiences that make us feel that way.

          2 replies 5 retweets 107 likes
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        6. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          Which is really just part and parcel of our deeply troubling preoccupation with nostalgia and escapism. The reason grown adults NEED to live vicariously through movies in really gross ways... But no, this about the other end of the spectrum.

          1 reply 4 retweets 107 likes
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        7. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          This is about people who go in the other direction. This is about how men, in an effort to transcend the bounds of perceived childlike naivety, get "serious" and built new fronts out of fear, and how we build fences to mitigate our suffering. And thus lose something crucial.

          1 reply 21 retweets 193 likes
          Show this thread
        8. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          This is about how we teach boys to worship this mentality, and blame outward, to hit, and shoot, and kill - all to to just steels themselves against emotion and pain. And so those fences turn into iron walls from the mountains and mountains of pain that come with life and grief.

          1 reply 9 retweets 157 likes
          Show this thread
        9. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          And so this is ultimately a story about breaking those walls. It's the ability to let things effect you. To undo all that is toxic about yourself. To realize that to call those things "child-like" is an outrageous disservice to selfhood, because they are "human-like."

          2 replies 20 retweets 221 likes
          Show this thread
        10. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          And they are critical to our sanity and becoming a balanced person capable of expressing the entire range of emotions without fear, especially when expressing fear itself. Because the alternative is the true misery of pushing yourself away from yourself.

          2 replies 7 retweets 142 likes
          Show this thread
        11. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          So yeah, I could tell have told you this whole story and just said "hardee har har, a guy in a Chewbacca outfit gave me a hug and it made me cry."

          2 replies 4 retweets 119 likes
          Show this thread
        12. Film Crit Hulk‏ @FilmCritHULK 16 Feb 2018

          The key is I actually let myself for once. Because deep-down I really needed to. And an old friend was there to let me know it was okay.

          34 replies 8 retweets 415 likes
          Show this thread
        13. End of conversation

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