I have concluded that the cute dogfighting is fun and I will use my powers of cognitive dissonance the leap over this staggering gulf of a troubling theme.
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Awww what a dapper young lad! ... ...... WHY DOES HE HAVE A WHIP AND A LOLLYpic.twitter.com/AdErVMIguN
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Post-defeat, every child looks like I just murdered their parents right in front of them. The happy music makes it downright Lynchianpic.twitter.com/wiCqtpzZXN
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I can't help it but I really, really, reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally feel like I'm murdering everyone's pets and taking all their money. This game is some cold ass shit.
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I just encountered my first Squirtle. I have heard this name many many times in pop culture references and never seen one. The second he popped in I couldn't stop laughing for a good 15 seconds.
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Okay bedtime for now. More later. Thank you for going along on this journey with me. So far I have one definitive conclusion. "This is a good video game."pic.twitter.com/zL55eulVUj
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*restlessly can't sleep* Are my strong pet children happy in their pokeballs!??! what even goes on in there. Is it like the tardis in there? OR Am I keeping them in confined kennels?? ARE THEY OKAY AND HAPPY AND BEING PET LIKE GOOD BOYS.
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Aside from finally understanding a friend’s handle, how am I supposed to get anything with perpetually confused psyduck following me around? He is my large adult son.pic.twitter.com/mxUa4A61Tj
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WE ARE CUTE LITTLE FRENCH SAILOR BOYS NOW. WE DID NO ONE TELL ME WE COULD BECOME CUTE LITTLE FRENCH SAILOR BOYS I WOULD HAVE BOUGHT THIS MUCH SOONERpic.twitter.com/wglOBE7Rl1
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I keep reading "poke balls" as "poke bowls" and at this point I would literally murder any one of you with my bare hands for a good poke bowl.
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A brief breakdown of my names so far: Pikachu: RyanReynolds Clefairy: Toddbert Oddish: BIG MAUI Onix: LebrOnix Pidgeotto: Birb Mankey: Mankey (if it ain't broke don't fix it) Meowlith: PuppyCat Psyduck: Mortimer Caterpie: Ralph Wiggum Kakuna: Brimley Geodude:
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You know what this game brings me back to a lot? My memories playing Final Fantasy I on NES up in my attic. It's not just the JRPG turn based mechanics, but that combined with the core simplicity of it that that game had. It's so lovely.
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I'm also finally starting to actually remember weaknesses of certain pokemon. It's like oh hey oddish what's up you seem really intimidating OH WAIT MY GUST IS GONNA FUCK ALL YOUR SHIT UP HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH, take that!
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WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS HOW DO I KILL IT FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!pic.twitter.com/0dwRvjxI2A
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YOU HAVE ALL NORMALIZED SOMETHING THAT SIMPLY SHOULDN'T BE. THIS IS NOT OKAY. THIS IS NOT NORMAL. I AM NOW NOT HERE FOR THIS GAME AND ITS DARK PURPOSES.
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I keep trying to get into the fun spirit of the game again, but I'm genuinely shook from this encounter and knowledge of the bubble clown demon who shall not be named. I'm just different now.
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You've all been dealing with this for so long... decades... you experienced this as kids... are you okay? BECAUSE THE THING ITSELF IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT
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Someone is breaking the first two rules of international police clubpic.twitter.com/nuCSyetTiF
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Sooooo. All the pokemon's names are just their species, and all they say is their name. So that means if I had a dog it would be called "dog' and all it would say was "dog!" .... ?
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So the weed pokemon literally evolves into my stoner best friend from collegepic.twitter.com/uNZ5iuCyNz
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