EatMyD1ck

@EatMyDick1217

I’m the account smaller, lesser people love to hate. The artist formerly known as Vixx ¥

Vrijeme pridruživanja: siječanj 2020.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    27. sij

    It’s a twofer!

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    Shower with a Friend Day, huh? i’m sorry, but nobody else is allowed in my crying chamber but me..

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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 19 sati

    Sitting with a co-worker and he shows me a picture of a person's body. You can see the chest in a black tank top, muscular arms and blonde hair around the shoulders. "Male or female?" he asks. I say "What difference does it make?"

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  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    My words are so powerful they upset strangers on a joke app. Do you see how stupid you look.

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    Yo everything sucks but you know what doesn’t? You. You rule.

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    That’s a massive ego you’ve got there... be a shame to miss an opportunity to mention it💋

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    Welcome to a world where simply doing the right thing makes you a hero.

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  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    4yo: we have a weed farm! Lady: Me: weedS in our yard Lady: *rapidly walks away* Me: MY KIDS DON'T GET HIGH 2yo: I get high *jumps*

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    For the 1000th time, my avi is not my face because I don’t want Twitter turning into Facebook. I don’t have an issue with my face. If I trust you, you’ve seen my face. I look like white Shrek. It’s really not that exciting.

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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I’m sure I’ll lose followers for this.. fuck it send Tough guys can’t take it when they’re called out for being a womanizer. It’s amazing that women defend a man who sends jerk off videos privately. He claims I’m just siding with others but about a year ago I got a video 🤷🏻‍♀️

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    I’m 45, but I truly feel more like 30 most days Laugh all you want at my green veggie juice, essential oils, and regular feeding on the souls of unsuspecting men as they sleep, but they seem to be working

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  12. prije 2 sata

    Was chatting with someone recently who said it was intimidating to talk to me. Listen, I’m not better than anyone else. I put my whore pants on the same as anyone else: one gloriously fish netted thigh at a time.

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Every anonymous or pic sent with a sign helps get our message out! Please help draw attention to our mission to develop free local programs that teach life saving early detection skills!

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I’m on the edge of my seat here. Do we owe these people more money? Will I have to do a journal entry? Just another bowel churning day in Finance.

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 4 sata

    Life is too short to not say all the I love you’s.

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    It's not the price of the gift, but the value it holds. Blowjobs are free, and now you've been tolds.

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Guys with no job be on tinder trying to match with me. Bro, you’re applying for the wrong job.

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 7 sati

    Nominate your favorite Tweeter in the following categories: Funniest Inspirational Crudest Saddest Tweet of the Yr Reply Guy/Gal @ < 2K @ > 20K Biggest Stoner Biggest Drunk Worst Mass unfollow Fuckboi Hottest Avi male/female/toon Most missed Twittercide

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Listen, I have dreams too. Mostly sex dreams, but dreams nonetheless.

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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I did everything I had to do at 5 am and now I get to color with toddlers all day and live my best life. Fuck you rat race.

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  21. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    guys, next time you’re out, buy your woman a chapstick because she probably can’t find the thirteen that she owns and you’ll be a hero.

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