Having been abused or traumatized is not a reason for you to abuse or traumatize someone else. This is true whether the person you are hurting shares traits with your abusers or not. /1
-
-
Show this thread
-
Your abuser sharing an orientation with another, separate person -or community of people - is never a reason for you to be hateful toward those people who are not your abuser. /2
Show this thread -
This is not meant to invalidate your pain. It is not a dismissal or a claim your abuse did not happen or your pain is not real. You have pain and you deserve safe, comfortable spaces in which to process and heal. /3
Show this thread -
This is an acknowledgement that abusing another person is not healing. If you harm or attempt to harm MAPs because of your feelings about your trauma history, you are taking a destructive and self-destructive action into someone else's space, to harm them /4
Show this thread -
based on an association you make between them and your abuse. It is also an acknowledgement that orientation does not cause abuse, and most CSA is perpetrated by situational offenders, not MAPs. Some studies with statistics: https://twitter.com/Earen13/status/1079640494257434624 … /5
This Tweet is unavailable.Show this thread -
Minor-attraction describes a set of chronophilias. Everyone who is attracted to another person has a chronophilia, and chronophilia is as innate and unchangeable as gender-based orientation. For some people, their inborn age-based orientation grows with them. /6
Show this thread -
For some people, it does not. Either way, it cannot be changed by therapy (or by castration), by shame, by support, or just by wishing hard enough. It is a part of who someone is, and it exists separate from action. /7
Show this thread -
It is actively unhealthy for you and harmful of you to react to pain by trying to force another human being into being something they are not, and cannot be, for your own comfort. Your emotional reaction to their existence has nothing to do with them, and you /8
Show this thread -
cannot solve it by exercising brute force or manipulation in an attempt to change or harm them. Even if you could change it, your own hurt would not be healed, and more hurt would not be prevented. No one would be saved from abuse, only subjected to the harm you chose to cause /9
Show this thread -
in the process. Hating and trying to hurt someone because in one way they are a little bit like your abuser, and reacting as though they are or must become an abuser themselves when that is not true, is a sign of very poor boundaries, and something you need to solve in the /10
Show this thread -
context of your own life, not ever by pushing your hatred onto another person. /11
Show this thread -
Make no mistake: intensely negative, factually-inaccurate bias is bigotry, and harassing, guilting, gaslighting, or shaming someone for/about a part of themselves they did not choose and cannot change IS abuse. /12
Show this thread -
And whether you call it an orientation, a paraphilia, a disorder, or something else- it did not cause your abuse. None of these things do. No person abuses because they have an orientation, or a paraphilia, or a disorder. They abuse because they make a choice to abuse. /13
Show this thread -
The person who harmed you made a choice to do so, and that is not someone else's fault, who wasnt't even there, had nothing to do with it- maybe wasn't even alive at the time. Stop blaming your abuser's attraction (whether they had it or not- remember the stats: /14
Show this thread -
most perpetrators of CSA are situational offenders, and not attracted to children). Start blaming your abuser, and stop abusing other, unrelated, real human beings for assumptions you make about who they are as people. /end
Show this thread
End of conversation
New conversation -
Loading seems to be taking a while.
Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.