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Earen13's profile
Earen
Earen
Earen
@Earen13

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Earen

@Earen13

Psych student. CSA survivor, DID, PTSD, POCD. MAP ally. Restorative/transformative justice. Ex-offender support. Primary prevention. Anti-contact.

Joined December 2018

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    Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

    Being a victim of CSA and/or CSEM is not a reason to hurt, harass, shame, or otherwise harm MAPs: a thread

    12:42 am - 5 Jan 2019
    • 4 Retweets
    • 9 Likes
    • lawn CaptainCrazy11 Loptr Sakuramap Pandarve_Alice 🌈 Acemindbreaker Kira Darius & John ☃️❄️chily lesb🌨️🧣
    1 reply . 4 retweets 9 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        Having been abused or traumatized is not a reason for you to abuse or traumatize someone else. This is true whether the person you are hurting shares traits with your abusers or not. /1

        1 reply . 2 retweets 5 likes
        Show this thread
      3. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        Your abuser sharing an orientation with another, separate person -or community of people - is never a reason for you to be hateful toward those people who are not your abuser. /2

        1 reply . 0 retweets 4 likes
        Show this thread
      4. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        This is not meant to invalidate your pain. It is not a dismissal or a claim your abuse did not happen or your pain is not real. You have pain and you deserve safe, comfortable spaces in which to process and heal. /3

        1 reply . 0 retweets 4 likes
        Show this thread
      5. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        This is an acknowledgement that abusing another person is not healing. If you harm or attempt to harm MAPs because of your feelings about your trauma history, you are taking a destructive and self-destructive action into someone else's space, to harm them /4

        1 reply . 0 retweets 4 likes
        Show this thread
      6. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        Earen Retweeted

        based on an association you make between them and your abuse. It is also an acknowledgement that orientation does not cause abuse, and most CSA is perpetrated by situational offenders, not MAPs. Some studies with statistics: https://twitter.com/Earen13/status/1079640494257434624 … /5

        Earen added,

        This Tweet is unavailable.
        1 reply . 0 retweets 3 likes
        Show this thread
      7. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        Minor-attraction describes a set of chronophilias. Everyone who is attracted to another person has a chronophilia, and chronophilia is as innate and unchangeable as gender-based orientation. For some people, their inborn age-based orientation grows with them. /6

        2 replies . 0 retweets 3 likes
        Show this thread
      8. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        For some people, it does not. Either way, it cannot be changed by therapy (or by castration), by shame, by support, or just by wishing hard enough. It is a part of who someone is, and it exists separate from action. /7

        1 reply . 0 retweets 2 likes
        Show this thread
      9. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        It is actively unhealthy for you and harmful of you to react to pain by trying to force another human being into being something they are not, and cannot be, for your own comfort. Your emotional reaction to their existence has nothing to do with them, and you /8

        1 reply . 0 retweets 2 likes
        Show this thread
      10. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        cannot solve it by exercising brute force or manipulation in an attempt to change or harm them. Even if you could change it, your own hurt would not be healed, and more hurt would not be prevented. No one would be saved from abuse, only subjected to the harm you chose to cause /9

        1 reply . 0 retweets 2 likes
        Show this thread
      11. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        in the process. Hating and trying to hurt someone because in one way they are a little bit like your abuser, and reacting as though they are or must become an abuser themselves when that is not true, is a sign of very poor boundaries, and something you need to solve in the /10

        1 reply . 0 retweets 3 likes
        Show this thread
      12. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        context of your own life, not ever by pushing your hatred onto another person. /11

        1 reply . 0 retweets 3 likes
        Show this thread
      13. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        Make no mistake: intensely negative, factually-inaccurate bias is bigotry, and harassing, guilting, gaslighting, or shaming someone for/about a part of themselves they did not choose and cannot change IS abuse. /12

        1 reply . 0 retweets 3 likes
        Show this thread
      14. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        And whether you call it an orientation, a paraphilia, a disorder, or something else- it did not cause your abuse. None of these things do. No person abuses because they have an orientation, or a paraphilia, or a disorder. They abuse because they make a choice to abuse. /13

        1 reply . 0 retweets 2 likes
        Show this thread
      15. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        The person who harmed you made a choice to do so, and that is not someone else's fault, who wasnt't even there, had nothing to do with it- maybe wasn't even alive at the time. Stop blaming your abuser's attraction (whether they had it or not- remember the stats: /14

        1 reply . 0 retweets 4 likes
        Show this thread
      16. Earen‏ @Earen13 5h5 hours ago

        most perpetrators of CSA are situational offenders, and not attracted to children). Start blaming your abuser, and stop abusing other, unrelated, real human beings for assumptions you make about who they are as people. /end

        0 replies . 0 retweets 3 likes
        Show this thread
      17. End of conversation

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