Death Star PR

@DeathStarPR

The Galactic Empire has been getting a bad rap. We're here to set the record straight. Email: DeathStarPR@gmail.com

In a galaxy far, far away...
Vrijeme pridruživanja: lipanj 2010.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    13. sij 2014.

    All I'm saying is Alderaan COULD have spontaneously combusted. You don't know, you weren't there.

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  2. 6. velj

    Emperor Palpatine is celebrating the Galactic Senate's impartial declaration that he is NOT a Sith Lord by walking down the street laughing maniacally and randomly electrocuting people with Force lightning.

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  3. 4. velj

    Asked the guy who designed the Death Star to design the Iowa Democratic Caucus app. Very confident nothing can possibly go wrong.

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  4. 3. velj
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  5. 1. velj

    Emperor Palpatine humbly accepts the fair and just decision by the unbiased Senate not to hear witnesses who would have offered overwhelming evidence he is a Sith Lord.

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  6. 31. sij

    If an Emperor executes Order 66 and wipes out all of the Jedi because he believes it will help him stay in power in the public interest that cannot be the kind of quid pro quo that results in impeachment.

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  7. 30. sij

    We've never heard of Alderaan. We didn't blow up Alderaan. There's no evidence we blew up Alderaan. The REAL story is about Luke Skywalker destroying the Death Star. IF we DID blow up Alderaan, it was legal to do it. We blew up Alderaan and we can do it again whenever we like.

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  8. 25. sij
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  9. 22. sij

    Proving conclusively the Emperor isn't a Sith Lord by not allowing a trial, refusing to hear from eyewitnesses and classifying all of the written evidence.

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  10. 20. sij

    In this perilous moment, both the radical and the realist models warrant serious consideration. For this reason, we are breaking with convention, and putting our support behind both Rey AND Kylo Ren as Emperor.

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  11. 10. sij

    Very disappointed that we have to indefinitely postpone the Jedi's Sith investigation because those darn Rebels have started another star war by us blowing up one of their bases.

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  12. 3. sij

    Earth is the only planet we’ve ever threatened to blow up that has replied with, “No, we’ve got this. We’ll just do it ourselves, thanks.”

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  13. 29. pro 2019.

    ┏━━┓┏━━┓┏━━┓┏━━┓ ┗━┓┃┃┏┓┃┗━┓┃┃┏┓┃ ┏━┛┃┃┃┃┃┏━┛┃┃┃┃┃ GIVE US MORE BABY YODA ┃┏━┛┃┃┃┃┃┏━┛┃┃┃┃ ┃┗━┓┃┗┛┃┃┗━┓┃┗┛┃ ┗━━┛┗━━┛┗━━┛┗━━┛

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  14. 25. pro 2019.

    We're making it okay to say "Merry Sithmas" again! In fact, if someone WON'T say it, please report them and we will deploy a "Sithmas Cheer Encouragement Squadron" to their home ASAP.

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  15. 25. pro 2019.

    Merry Sithmas, everyone! Celebrating in the traditional way: by lighting the Alderaan Christmas tree.

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  16. 16. pro 2019.

    Baby Yoda doesn't want you to spoil . You don't want to upset Baby Yoda, do you?! Not even WE'RE THAT evil.

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  17. 2. pro 2019.

    The beginning of every conversation with Emperor Palpatine

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  18. 30. stu 2019.

    Me watching a lone X-Wing fly towards the one small thermal exhaust port I never got around to covering.

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  19. 25. stu 2019.

    Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering...

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  20. 20. stu 2019.

    DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF DARTH PLAGUEIS THE WISE? I THOUGHT NOT. IT'S NOT A STORY THE JEDI WOULD TELL YOU. IT'S A SITH LEGEND...

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  21. 19. stu 2019.

    Feeling very confident about this one, boys. What could possibly go wrong?!

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