David Chalifoux

@DavidChalifoux

it's satire

Chicago, IL
Joined September 2009
187 Photos and videos Photos and videos

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  1. Pinned Tweet
    Mar 20

    Choose one to protect you. The other will try to kill you.

    1 reply . 2 retweets 7 likes
  2. Retweeted
    Jul 10

    imagine the Snapchat investors asking the CEO what he's got planned to stop the stock from plummeting & he pulls up this mf on a powerpoint

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    188 replies . 31,323 retweets 91,916 likes
  3. Retweeted
    Apr 3

    have u ever seen a lizard do push ups?

    261 replies . 18,684 retweets 33,224 likes
  4. Retweeted
    Jun 28
    Replying to

    They will never let you down

    763 replies . 6,202 retweets 24,326 likes
  5. Retweeted
    Jun 28

    I love floors

    2,300 replies . 22,652 retweets 59,738 likes
  6. Retweeted
    Jun 19

    me: art is the closest thing we have 2 immortality also me:

    14 replies . 167 retweets 534 likes
  7. Retweeted
    Jun 15

    [my tweet gets 16 likes] wow 😳😳 since this is blowing up, check out my gofundme project raising money to tape a bunch of squirrels together

    28 replies . 3,099 retweets 13,970 likes
  8. May 1

    When you get your AP Psych test back and you got a 1

    4 retweets 15 likes
  9. Retweeted
    Apr 7

    You vs Me

    1 reply . 13 retweets 42 likes
  10. Retweeted
    Apr 2

    Did she die at Coachella 300BC

    The skull of a young girl who was buried wearing a ceramic wreath - 300-400BC. The New Archaeological Museum of Patras Greece.
    171 replies . 60,832 retweets 146,833 likes
  11. Mar 29

    Human child found inside the belly of a python

    1 like
  12. Retweeted
    Mar 21

    You know what I'm about to say it I don't care that you just bought your Lollapalozza ticket

    17 replies . 1,569 retweets 5,391 likes
  13. Retweeted
    Mar 10

    ladies u only have $3 to build ur perfect man: $700 - educated $500 - rich $3- soundcloud rapper $250- loyal

    82 replies . 5,255 retweets 12,270 likes
  14. Retweeted
    Mar 10

    follow your dreams

    2 replies . 21 retweets 81 likes
  15. Retweeted
    Mar 10

    9 replies . 124 retweets 446 likes
  16. Retweeted
    Mar 4

    HOP ON THE BOIS

    1 retweet 4 likes
  17. Feb 27

    Gosling: "Node.js is the only real dev language"

    1 retweet 3 likes
  18. Retweeted
    Feb 19

    me: Lord, if it's not your will, tell me no. Lord: no me:

    243 replies . 73,506 retweets 139,439 likes
  19. Retweeted
    Jan 21

    I'm a nasty girl

    2,422 replies . 166,492 retweets 473,638 likes
  20. Retweeted
    Feb 16

    Musical finna 🅱️e lit🔥🔥

    2 retweets 8 likes

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