Yeah, I was printing it as %lld to debug but tried to make it nicer to show it here and now realize it screwed it up.
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I think I was on the right track with twitter.com/DanielMicay/st but then confused myself with this.
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It seems to be a linker bug introduced by the kernel LLVM being updated to 12.0.x for Android 12.
It doesn't impact 3rd generation Pixels despite them using the same LLVM toolchain because they still use ld.gold from an old version of binutils rather than ld.lld.
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I just got sidetracked because it started looking at bugs.llvm.org/show_bug.cgi?i but I don't think it's the actual problem after all.