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We should pass a Woman’s Heartbeat law: if a woman has a heartbeat, you can’t tell her what to do with her goddamn body, ever.
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
I like how we all collectively have enjoyed The Witcher, but not like too much, as if we've all agreed we'll never let ourselves be hurt by a genre tv show again
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
Hey it turns out that democracy dies in broad fuckin daylight too.
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I mean, not *actually* good. But I’m sentimental.
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Well, at least I hope Trump learned a valuable lesson about the importance of not corrupting the 2020 election that there will be no consequences for corrupting.
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Now that we’ve decided a president can do whatever the hell they want, even for blatantly corrupt reasons, I can’t wait until the next Democratic one is removed from office because they forgot to wear their flag pin one day.
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So I’m currently bleeding because I accidentally stabbed myself with a can of whipped cream, in case anyone is curious about my survival skills.
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
airline gate attendant: I understand that your little boy is difficult and hard to keep track of, but no, airline policy strictly forbids checking children in the cargo hold. you’ll have to— members of the band Kansas: <deep breath>
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
Do I need a new notebook? No. Did I resist the temptation to buy a new notebook when I walked past a stationery shop? Also, no.
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NOVELISTS WRITING ABOUT GROWING UP IN MINNESOTA: We ate hot dish and went sledding in April and apologized for absolutely everything. Uff da! MY ACTUAL CHILDHOOD IN MINNESOTA: We ate hot dish and went sledding in April and apologized for absolutely everything. Uff da!https://twitter.com/WenzlerPowers/status/1221968768408133632 …
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
new project: write me :) me: ok cool let me first download 50+ articles to become an expert in a field i don’t do new project: wait- me: and read up on the entire history of victorian england new project: i’m not a dissertation me: and learn Latin new project: ....
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
good stuff:
@Aetna is making me appeal a skull surgery on an 8-week-old baby to clarify that it wasn't an elective cosmetic procedureThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo -
Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
ABC: Bolton’s book NBC: Bolton’s book CNN: Bolton’s book Cartoon Network: Bolton’s book Animal Planet: Bolton’s book FOX News: Fun decorations for Groundhog Day Groundhog Channel: Bolton’s book
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
#TheWitcher
creator Andrzej Sapkowski requested not to be involved in the show's production — 'I do not like working too hard or too long. By the way, I do not like working at all'
(via @io9 | http://bit.ly/36wAYP6 )pic.twitter.com/kvlNJyaezK
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
I guarantee you they looked like fat birds. they absolutely were giant chickens and I know for a fact they didn’t look how we say they dohttps://twitter.com/KristinBingham/status/1220297222132289536 …
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Jan. 24, 2132. The Forever Primary rages on. I broke my hand knocking on doors again. No one is ever home, but I knock anyway, like my father did before me. Our precinct captain keeps mumbling “Iowa is almost here,” but nobody knows what that means. My thoughts are troubled.
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
Have you folks seen the kid on TikTok that's recreating scenes from INTO THE SPIDERVERSE with his parents because it's my new favorite thing, they're so cute and creativepic.twitter.com/RaW63OYhyo
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Autocorrect just tried to change “amigurumi” to “a MAGA rally,” which is honestly a different level of stress than I was shooting for.
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Daniel Silvermint Retweeted
Ok which one of you assholes said 2016’s name three times
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