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David R. MacIver

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Software testing R&D, mainly Hypothesis. My mandate includes weird bugs. I have resting villain face. 🦄

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    1. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      19. This realisation that emotions are fundamentally embodied seems to be missing from popular conceptions of emotions. It's a normal concept in therapeutic contexts, but outside those circles people tend to think emotions are in their head and just happen to affect their body.

      1 reply 1 proslijeđeni tweet 13 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    2. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      20. None of which is to say that your brain isn't involved in your emotions - of course it is - but there's a complex brain/body feedback loop. Brain: Uh oh. This looks like bad thing. Better prepare. Body: *enters flight or fight mode* <- sensation that starts the emotion loop.

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 9 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    3. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      21. Circling back to regulation vs suppression: I think a lot of where everybody gets fucked up is that kids have a lot of feelings (the world is pretty overwhelming when everything is new!) and it's much easier to teach them to suppress those than to regulate them.

      0 proslijeđenih tweetova 12 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    4. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
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      22. My impression is that which version of the bad lessons in what to do about emotions you get depends on which gender you're assigned (and also culture). In broad strokes, boys get taught to ignore their emotions, while girls get taught to second guess theirs. Both are bad.

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 21 korisnik označava da mu se sviđa
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    5. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
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      23. The difference being whether you are aware of your emotional experience or not - not noticing you feel X vs noticing that you feel X and deciding that that's stupid and you shouldn't feel X. I think the former is worse for you, but that might be a grass is greener thing.

      0 proslijeđenih tweetova 9 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    6. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
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      24. Regardless of whether it's worse, you tend to have to pass through the latter stage in fixing it. If you've been ignoring your emotional state it's probably a mess, so when you stop ignoring it you're not going to like it much.

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 7 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    7. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      25. "Your feelings are valid" is a route out of the second guessing stage - it stops you from going "But I SHOULDN'T feel this way" and helps you approach those feelings with curiousity. But it's a strategy more than a truth. Feelings aren't valid, or invalid, they just are.

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 15 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    8. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      26. Saying "It's valid to feel hurt" is no more or less true than "It's valid to have a broken leg". It doesn't really matter whether it's valid or not, your leg is still broken. The question is what to do about it, and maybe prioritise the leg over self-recrimination.

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 11 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    9. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      27. As a strategy rather than a truth, you can take or leave it depending on whether it's currently working for you. Sometimes it's better to go "No, these emotions are bullshit, I'm just going to weather them until I'm in a healthier place for dealing with it."

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 9 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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    10. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      (I'm going to pause for a bit. Will resume later)

      1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 1 korisnik označava da mu se sviđa
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      David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
      • Prijavi Tweet

      28. The less pithy but I think more important version of "your feelings are valid" is I think this: Feelings are not moral failings. You don't have to like or dislike how you feel, but feelings do not reflect badly on you, only your actions on those feelings.

      10:15 - 18. pro 2019.
      • 13 oznaka „sviđa mi se”
      • seamus Alberto Albero 🌲 Josh Schultz Łukasz Langa dr elmyra Chrisi T Rhys Cassidy Ian Hines
      0 proslijeđenih tweetova 13 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
        1. Novi razgovor
        2. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          29. Lets get personal for a minute. My particular emotional processing problem I'm working on at the moment is this: I'm actually very good at emotional awareness... as long as I pay attention. And I really don't want to pay attention. It's at best too intense, at worse aversive.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 10 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        3. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
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          30. I wouldn't exactly say I have alexithymia. Given the level of introspective discussions about emotions I have with friends I suspect some people I know would smack me if I said I had it. But it's definitely something in that general space.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 4 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        4. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          31. This enables a level of self-analysis that I imagine looks quite impressive from the outside, but it's kinda weird only having awareness of emotional states through conscious introspection. I think it's less weird and more normal than it sounds, but it's still weird.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 6 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        5. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          32. My suspicion is that it's partly a disocciation thing, and that a lot of people (especially men) are disocciating a lot more than we credit, and that a lot of failures of emotional processing are actually dissociative states where your mind is disconnecting from your body.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 12 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        6. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          33. Dissociation is of course not male-specific, but given that a) Emotions are experienced bodily and b) Boys are trained to ignore their emotions and "toughen up", the easiest way to do that is to learn to dissociate, and I think most of us start doing it quite young.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 8 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        7. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          (I expect much of that will apply equally to trans people who were forced through masculinity training despite not being male. I'm not going to talk that much about that side of things because it would be theorising well outside my experience)

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 4 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        8. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          34. The big problem with ignoring your feelings is that they don't actually stop working - they still do exactly what they're designed to do, that information is just screened off from you.

          7 proslijeđenih tweetova 26 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        9. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          35. You know the "Not sure if the world is terrible and everyone hates me or if I need to eat a sandwich" problem? That is what *everything* is like if you're not paying attention to how you're feeling. Your behaviour will not make sense to you.

          1 reply 2 proslijeđena tweeta 16 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        10. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          36. The claims I've read for the damage suppressed emotions do to your physical health and how much healthy emotional processing helps are so dramatic that frankly I don't believe them, but I'd be surprised if there wasn't at least some link between emotions and physical health.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 6 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        11. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          37. In particular constant muscle tension is bad for you, and if you suppress awareness of how stressed you are then you're going to be in a permanent fight or flight state that keeps your body tense. (I suspect this is my problem - I genuinely don't know how to relax muscles)

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 10 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        12. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          David R. MacIver je proslijedio/a tweet korisnika/ceDavid R. MacIver

          38. Clarification of https://twitter.com/DRMacIver/status/1207367418710020097 … They do what they're designed to do but you don't act on that. e.g. a body in fight or flight is fine if you're going to fight or flee. It's a terrible idea if you're going to sit there pretending things are fine.

          David R. MacIver je dodan/na,

          David R. MacIver @DRMacIver
          34. The big problem with ignoring your feelings is that they don't actually stop working - they still do exactly what they're designed to do, that information is just screened off from you.
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          1 reply 1 proslijeđeni tweet 5 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        13. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          David R. MacIver je proslijedio/a tweet korisnika/ceDavid R. MacIver

          39. Have you noticed that people often outsource their emotions to those around them? Especially positive ones. e.g. I've pointed out before that the manic pixie dream girl is a fantasy of vicariously experiencing joy.https://twitter.com/DRMacIver/status/1165990402777853953 …

          David R. MacIver je dodan/na,

          David R. MacIver @DRMacIver
          The manic pixie dream girl is primarily a fantasy of getting to experience intense emotions vicariously, without having to give up a personal and socially enforced attachment to an understanding of masculinity that does not allow one to experience them oneself.
          4 proslijeđena tweeta 28 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        14. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          40. I am not entirely sure how this fits in with the emotions as expressions of bodily feelings model. It seems like it doesn't. It's closer to a form of empathy, which is a kind of second-person subjective experience. You're experiencing emotions from *someone else's* feelings.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 3 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        15. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          41. There is definitely something about emotions which is shared though - this ties in to the "emotions as behaviour vs emotions as feelings" thing. e.g. it seems to make sense to talk about the mood of a crowd, and that it's more than the sum of the mood of its members

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 5 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        16. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          42. Your experience of emotions through others doesn't actually come from their feelings though. Consider watching a sad movie. The loop goes: Their behaviour -> Your feelings -> Your emotions You're modelling this as if their feelings were involved but they're not really.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 3 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        17. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          43. In a normal group emotional experience there are many feedback loops that do extend through everyone's feelings. e.g. in a conversation there's a loop my feelings -> my behaviour -> your thoughts -> your feelings -> your behaviour -> my thoughts -> my feelings.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 3 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        18. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          44. One of the most obvious benefits I've found to improving emotional processing is that it's often essential to getting unblocked - when there's something I can't make myself do, being able to understand why is often key to doing it.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 11 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        19. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          45. I suspect this is only the most obvious benefit because I'm not making especially good progress and this is the low hanging fruit.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 3 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        20. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          46. Also just because I can do this doesn't actually mean I'm magically never blocked. I've got several big things I've been blocked on for months, partly because even the question of identifying why I'm blocked on them is aversive.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 10 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        21. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          47. I mentioned briefly Matthew Ratcliffe's notion of "Existential Feelings" as feelings which structure your current subjective experience. One important such structuring is that often depression is experienced as a restriction on what emotions you can currently feel.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 9 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        22. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          48. In "emotional blunting" this can be total and you feel emotionless, but even without that depression is often experienced as the feeling that some feelings are impossible. I mentioned hopelessness, but also joylessness: Not just a lack of joy, but that joy is impossible.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 7 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        23. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          49. One thing that can be helpful is to notice that not all positive emotions go away. e.g. I often find that I am capable of sustaining interest in things (experiencing the feeling of interest) during depressive episodes where I'm not really capable of other positives.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 10 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        24. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          50. An odd way this shows up for me is what games I'm able to play. For example I cannot play Untitled Goose Game while depressed, because playing it relies on being able to experience the emotion of "glee" fairly heavily - there's really not much game there if you can't.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 12 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        25. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          51. Celeste on the other hand I can play even while fairly depressed, because the emotions it requires are mostly interest, stubbornness, and rage, which tend to be ones I have relatively stable access to. (read what you will into how much Celeste I've been playing recently)

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 12 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        26. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          52. The Goose game example is interesting, because nobody would say they feel "gleeless", but the feeling is quite specific and is different from joylessness. My suspicion is that experiencing restricted emotional ranges is quite common but we don't notice most of them.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 11 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        27. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          53. There seems to be a huge amount of variation in the intensity with which people experience emotions, and I cannot tell how much of this is healthy variation and how much of it is that disassociation and some forms of depression tend to dial down the intensity.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 10 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        28. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          54. Also some forms of depression dial up the intensity. I can't say much of that from personal experience (or much about intense emotional experiences at all - I am very much on the not intense end of the scale, and a lot of my current work is on trying to understand that)

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 6 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        29. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
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          55. An idea that is common in some of my circles is that basically everyone is traumatised to some greater or lesser degree, and that trauma is the root of most of our emotional regulation problems. This seems... more plausible to me than it used to, but I have many questions.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 10 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        30. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          56. The everything-is-trauma model people seem to be like everyone else in that it promises a miracle fix and that everything can be easily cured with this one weird trick. I think they're probably mostly right, but I'm not yet convinced they're right in a helpful way.

          0 proslijeđenih tweetova 3 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđa
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        31. David R. MacIver‏ @DRMacIver 18. pro 2019.
          • Prijavi Tweet

          57. I think it probably *is* the case that school, family, and other bad childhood experiences have left most of us carrying around a lot of anxiety that we don't really understand and are suppressing most of the time, and that most people would benefit from untangling that.

          1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 8 korisnika označava da im se sviđa
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        32. Još 46 drugih odgovora

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