Cyrus McQueen

@CyrusMMcQueen

Comedian. Writer. Named One of the Sexiest Men in New York by the NY Post. Seen in the film OBVIOUS CHILD and on NBC's LAST COMIC STANDING.

Brooklyn, USA
S-a alăturat în mai 2013

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  1. Tweet fixat
    8 nov. 2016

    didn't win... America lost.

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  2. acum 1 oră

    When the President congratulates the 49ers draft pick instead of his 49-year-old wife on her birthday, it can only mean one thing... Melania’s been slacking on her white supremacy... She better start trolling LeBron or somethin... 😏

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  3. acum 2 ore

    Trump tweeted to congratulate the 49ers Draft pick but not his 49-year-old wife who’s birthday was yesterday... So much WINNING...

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  4. acum 6 ore

    Only a piece of shit celebrates number two...

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  5. acum 6 ore

    What a surprise... You’re all about being Number 2...

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  6. acum 6 ore

    My wife gets up and asks if I wanna split a coffee. I’m like, Ooh yes please! She gets to the kitchen and goes, actually, I think I’ll have tea, want tea instead? I go you can’t do that. That’s like drivin to Disney World and goin, wanna check out this traveling carnival instead?

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  7. acum 8 ore

    Bigoted Nick Bosa, who famously derided Colin Kaepernick, was just congratulated by Trump for being drafted #2 despite Kyler Murray, the phenomenal black quarterback being the #1 pick. Racists who technically come in second just hate being in the shadow of transcendent black men.

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  8. acum 9 ore

    Trump’s doin with the Presidency what all spoiled rich kids do: he’s destroyin it. Rich people don’t appreciate shit. They’ll take a dream car someone works their whole life for, fuckin total it, and just shrug their shoulders. Stop celebrating rich folks. Makes no goddamn sense.

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  9. acum 10 ore

    The gym window looks out onto the street and a crowd gathers to watch! The cops are tryna push people back when, a woman in the crowd recognizes him... it’s his ex who still loves him! They meet eyes and it inspires him to stay on the thing. She mouths I love you and folks cheer!

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  10. acum 11 ore

    Ugh, I’m still in bed but my wife’s up catchin up on American Idol in the living room... But someone just commented on her post so now she sees I’m up and been on twitter and now I gotta go watch American Idol with her... 😩

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  11. a redistribuit
    17 apr.

    Trump may not be like a divorced dad but you can definitely compare him to your moms douchey boyfriend after the divorce. The one who buys you a hat and acts like it’s a big deal... And your mom’s like, “You thank him? Did you say thank you to Steve? That was very nice of him”...

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  12. a redistribuit
    20 apr.

    The stain on Monica Lewinski’s dress got Clinton into trouble... The stain on Lindsey Graham’s tie is keeping Trump outta trouble... 😏

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  13. acum 11 ore

    It’ll have you on the edge of your seat! Will he fall off or won’t he? People constantly scrambling to bring him water and Gatorade. Bomb technicians constantly checkin in, seein how many more flights he thinks he has in him... Then they discover another bomb on the treadmill! 😱

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  14. acum 20 de ore

    Can’t believe I almost missed it... Happy 49th Birthday to about 75% of Melania Trump...

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  15. 26 apr.

    Was on the stair master at the gym and it went from level 8 to level 15 all of a sudden and I fell off... But it got me thinkin: That’d be a great premise for an action movie! But instead of like in Speed, a guy can’t get off the stair master or it’ll blow up... Call it STEP OFF!

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  16. 26 apr.

    Damn, lemon headed secretly told Trump “I can land the plane” in reference to the Mueller Investigation... Looks like he landed his little candy ass right on his mushroom cap...

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  17. 26 apr.

    I have no idea what the public urination fines are like in places like Charlottesville and Chattanooga but, I’d certainly pay Robert E. Lee a visit since Trump’s so convinced he’s #1... 😏

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  18. 26 apr.

    They finally renovated the Godiva store by my job... got chocolate bringin her chocolate...

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  19. 26 apr.

    You gotta be shittin me about this Maria Butina sentence. So you can come to 🇺🇸, spy on us, help throw our election and all you get is 18 months? Meanwhile young migrants are also coming here, they’re not spying, not throwin elections, and they’re being put in cages indefinitely?

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  20. 26 apr.

    Country music comes out of rural poverty. Rap music, conversely, comes out of urban poverty... But one thing you will never be able to square with me: Poor people of color don’t hold poor white folks responsible for their problems yet, in Red States, it seems to be the opposite.

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  21. 26 apr.

    Yo, right now Robert E. Lee is in eternal hell catchin a hot poker into his fuckin prostate... He’s responsible for how many thousands of people dying? And for what? So that millions more would continue to work for free? So that they could continue being brutalized and sodomized?

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