Is this not damaging to women tho.....?
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Nah. I know plenty of people in healthy relationships, and none of them are wearing striped suits and feathered hats.
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That's reading the surface. The "feathered hats" (taking that phrase as a synecdoche) are a tool for a purpose - standing out, giving strange women an excuse to start conversations, giving her an easy mark for testing his frame, etc. Different situations, different tools.
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