Yes, M/F reproduction is different, but for any given trait, you will find overlapping distributions, usually with greater male variability. If you want to make (for example) a special forces squad, you will be able to find some women right at the edge of the distinction.
The women you'd be picking for your military would all be captured because you're picking them on physical criteria that guarantees attractiveness Also note that there's overlap on "gets killed" but no overlap where losing men get captured and married off to conquering women
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There are even some Japanese men with American wives now. Of course, this is an area where the differences are most extreme.https://youtu.be/a4CuEiVtG58
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The US is a particularly strange global empire but your point is valid - there is *some* tiny overlap between men's and women's outcomes of losing a war - less than 1% of losing men will wind up with brides from the winning side.
End of conversation
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