[He could feel the heat of that sigh from where he sat, swallowing as he let the paper go and reached for the coffee mug again] What's to say? It was a horrible place, a failed mission, and I regret convincing you to come. If I hadn't, you'd be better off. [stirs his coffee]
We didn't have a campfire. [His tone was unhappy as the frown on his face, pulling his coffee mug under himself to look into it.] [The question had him twitch though, gaze snapping up.] Was that ever a question? [that was a surprise, uncertainty, Lloyd felt himself tense up.]
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[frowns.] [hes starting to regret ever bringing this conversation up.] I dont know! Apparently i dont know jack shit. Youve been avoidingor shutting DOWN half of our conversations since sapphire so...???? [audibly ????s]
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... I haven't. [it was a weak protest, because it was such a lie. Every time he was around Furfur he thought about that stuff, about how he failed and let him down.] [Maybe this was that chance to stop it before it got further. Break it now before it can start.] +
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Things have been busy. After such. events. [no those words were dry and ash in his mouth, the same lies they told the reporter before.] After that boss fight, I just needed to rest. Are you surprised I haven't been acting my usual self? [great, turning this on him. Brilliant.]
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[his ears go down.] [Why does.. none of this feel truthful. Why can he just have a straight damn answer for once. rest. Everyone needed rest. Thats not an excuse to start shutting people out.] [he 8^('s ] should i just fuck off?
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[he's staring holes into the newspaper laid out on the table, one hand clenching a little into a fist. As if physically struggling here.] You'd be better off if you did. Probably. [he sighs, not sure what to say or do. And it paralysed him. To not know the best plan.] +
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[He opened his mouth to speak but, closed it again.] [So close to saying, I don't want you to.] [But he shouldn't factor 'his wants' into these things.]
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[OUCH.] [And there goes his heart. its like a guitar snapped and the sound echoes through the most empty room.] [He breaths in. clenthcing his fist.] and... You? [i dont wanna fuck off, pwese.]
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[he closes his eyes for a moment, furfur's question prompting an internal debate he'd long avoided.] I don't. Know. Because either way this hurts, and I don't know which is the lesser of the two evils. But. [he takes a breath in, trying to go through his logically.]+
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| 24 | Ninetails (Ice)