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I initially thought that, because I'm not ashamed to be trans, it'd be no problem that my history living as a man is so public. I thought that because I'm honest and shun euphemism it wouldn't bother me. But it's not that simple.
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I feel like a fugitive from my past gender, this nightmare always lurking behind me, potentially nullifying all my present experience.
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Of course that's not how I *should* feel, but when has human psychology ever abided by the way things *should* be?
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Hey, you and everything you are is important. Don’t forget that.
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Makes total sense. Even though my job was supportive of my transition I still felt the need to move on, I even changed cities...I just didn't want reminders of my past... I refer to my old male self as my dead best friend. I acknowledge him but it was limiting and painful.
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Probably never. I can relate to this in a sexuality sense, in the least. I'm completely different from the girl who was me before I came out. People still bring her up to me from time to time and I feel terrified and physically disgusted.
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Things she's done still rack around my brain and cause me to shudder and be like "holy fucking shit stop thinking about that; don't remember that." It's hard. But you are you now, it is your truth now. I'm just sorry you have these stark reminders. So much love to you.
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I'm sorry you're going through that right now.
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Don't ever worry about what you should feel. All your feelings are valid. We cannot control our emotions, only what we do about them.
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I don't see why you should not feel like that. Evolving is a frightful experience. I think it makes perfect sense. Hoping you'll be throught this soon.
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me a trans: should idk bout that. these feelings sound pretty normal to me bb. its ok if ya wanna hide pre now you for a while if thats what you need.
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I support you. Hell, I'd lend you some jewelry if we were in the same area. Get you some self-soothing oxytocin somehow and know that you're loved.
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