Second, also as we cover in the book, no one here owes anyone anything in terms of replies. If I sent a forward-facing tweet, I generally try to keep to the rules of Twitter, as I'm coming to them, even if they have a public tweet out there. Not so for replies.
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Prikaži ovu nit
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You see, narcissistic and special as we all like to believe we aren't, the old song has a point: "you're so vain, you probably think this tweet is about you." We don't write our public-facing tweets TO people (unless they're subtweets, inapplicable here).
1 proslijeđeni tweet 55 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
So, if you--or I, for that matter--reply to a public tweet, that where the cordiality comes in, the impossible conversations stuff. If someone replies rudely to you, they were rude to you FIRST, no matter what they felt as a result of reading your public-facing tweet.
1 reply 1 proslijeđeni tweet 49 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
In that case, where they've replied rudely to you, according to game theory, the iterated prisoner's dilemma, particularly, they defected first. The optimal strategy for that is something like tit-for-tat (with random forgiveness). They defect; you can defect back.
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 41 korisnik označava da mu se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
The game theory actually matters here because otherwise, if you always hold yourself to a "higher" standard, you leave yourself vulnerable to a completely losing situation for yourself (especially in the midst of a pile-on, which is psychologically interesting).
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 48 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
The best thing to do, of course, is to ignore dickheads entirely, and I encourage it strongly with one exception: when they're proving the point you were making in the first place. In that case, game on. That's how I play Twitter. Want a cordial conversation? It's in private.
2 proslijeđena tweeta 57 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
I'll show some vulnerability and get real with y'all here too. I used to be really polite, patient, generous, etc., with my replies, even when they were rude. I was kind of known around here for it. That's the losing position in the game, and eventually, you feel it.
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 54 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
Eventually, especially after you clear about 8,000 followers (and it gets worse as you go up), double especially if you're controversial at all, you can't stay open to it very easily. Maybe a few can, but most can't. It will make them insane. I'm not a saint. I can't.
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 38 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
It's very important as social media gets more and more influential and integrated into our lives to realize that being too open to it is actually psychologically really bad for you. At best, it's too much information to process. At worst, it's abuse and a deconstruction machine.
8 proslijeđenih tweetova 48 korisnika označava da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
If you stay really wide open to engagement on social media and are controversial, trolls, butthurt people, bots, the confused, the angry, the hard of reading, etc., will eventually deconstruct your sanity and faith in humanity. It's honestly better to clap back selectively.
3 proslijeđena tweeta 44 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit
It's not quite on point, but an essay Helen and I wrote some time ago bears sharing again in this context. People here can demand to be heard, maybe because they think they're important, or they're clueless, or they're mad about something you said.https://areomagazine.com/2018/04/07/freedom-of-speech-and-the-fallacy-of-demanding-to-be-heard/ …
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One last thing: If you come to me in private AFTER insulting me in public and getting dunked back on, you probably shouldn't expect a cordial welcome. Job's on you to warm things up again first. And if you're a serial harasser, job's harder. Good luck, it's probably worth it.
1 reply 0 proslijeđenih tweetova 44 korisnika označavaju da im se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit -
James Lindsay, doing the reading je proslijedio/a tweet korisnika/ceJames Lindsay, doing the reading
James Lindsay, doing the reading je dodan/na,
James Lindsay, doing the reading @ConceptualJamesOdgovor korisnicima @ConceptualJames @MaddsenOpheliaTo mitigate this on Twitter, as those loops are bad for everyone, I also keep a rule that if I clap back, I mute right after (except in certain situations, like a really big account or something, though the mute comes eventually). I can't keep playing that way.0 proslijeđenih tweetova 21 korisnik označava da mu se sviđaPrikaži ovu nit
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