Literally just read this on the toilet. 
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Are you shitting me? Wait, no.
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I swear I'm no longer on the toilet so I hope that makes it ok for me to comment on how handsome you are, Pete!
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Oh so now you're shitting me. Just kidding, that's very kind of you, thank you :)
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Most welcome.
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You've been in the wrong bathrooms.
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Jokes on you Conan! I'm still in bed!
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You have a toilet in your bed? Genius!!
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My whole life is a toilet!
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I literally read this while taking a shit
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Back in my day we read shampoo bottles 100 times if we had to.
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Covfefe that!
Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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Unless you kept your encyclopedias in the bathroom.
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So that's why you're so smart
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TBH they were collections of The Far Side.
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