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Chris Cope
@ChrisCopeComedy
Brand Ambassador Comedian/Actor Sunshine State Stories Podcast
Chris Cope’s Tweets
I want a jury of 12 people who were smart enough to get out of jury duty but then felt so compelled about my miscarriage of Justice that they assemble and declare me innocent.
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I love when cancels your flight for no reason and then rebooks you a shit flight back and just says whoopsie daisy like it doesn’t ruin your day.
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Dockers got this lil pocket pocket action going on, it’s small for coins I guess. I use it for my weed vape.
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Bears hibernate for months. Imagine the groggy state that must feel like to wake up to. Like coming out of a coma once a year.
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Friday and Saturday — is back in town! Two shows each night and I’m hosting.
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I got mad respect for a woman to go after her attacker even though it would bring the worst people in our country after her. I’d make him pay me in small change. Good for her!!
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How come we haven’t domesticated squirrels yet? Feel like we are really missing out.
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- Bacon65.9%
- Sausage34.1%
41 votesFinal results
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One thing about me is that I never let being full get in the way of eating more
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So beautiful to see a glacier, huge thanks to for letting me bring the laughs and get to be a adventurer at the same time!
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You know if Tony Gwynn came back today and went 0 for 1,114 at the plate, he’d be a fucking zombie.
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I don’t care if you walk a mile in my shoes cause both of us know we will taking a lot of breaks.
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They let you drink at baseball games, yet we can’t at least vape weed at games. It’s 2023!! Change the rules!!
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Some heroes wear shells!
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Sex-mad tortoise saved his species from extinction after fathering 800 kids
Follow @pubity for the latest news updates on Twitter or you’re missing out 
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Live your best life and always make sure you got the right person watching your six!!
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Winning Titles and Smokes Weed! She should be given an extra title! Ridiculous in 2023!!!
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My good pal has a new album out. It’s hilarious. You can get it anywhere that’s has great comedy!!
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Good God Fella!!
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So everyone online (sarcasm) is saying since Tucker got fired they’re leaving Fox News. Will they switch to NewsMax or OAN until dominion and Smartmatic bankrupts them off the air?
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Owning a small dog is essentially playing “what’s in your mouth” 100,000 times a day.
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I dislike the term “just desserts, nothing negative should ever be applied to dessert.
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Packing is great for me cause it means either adventure lays ahead or it’s time to head on home.
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Whenever someone says todays baseball game will be a rubber match, I picture two condoms fighting it out.
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Ding Dong The Racist Dickhead Is Dead!
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Readers added context they thought people might want to know
As of right now, there is little to no verification that Thomas Robb has actually died.
The only site that backs up this claim is snbc13, that cites a tweet as the source for the claim.
snbc13.com/thomas-robb-am…
twitter.com/thatsfetty/sta…
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Pretty sure I just tore my sack doing a karate kick cause I’ve been listening to Kung Fu Fighting on loop for the last 20 mins.
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Anytime someone says “everyone I know… yadda yadda. Let’s be honest most people know like 15 people. It’s a small sample size Mark!!
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