Charlie Morris  🏁  🟥

If having a vagina qualifies one to speak on behalf of women, I've got a few things to say:

We MUST address the issue of short men not being considered as attractive on the dating market. On behalf of all women, thank you for your attention.

More Stalls In Men's Bathrooms NORMALIZE SITTING TO PEE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS Again, I've been deputized to say: All women thank you for your attention to these pressing matters.

As a person with a VAGINA you need to LISTEN when I say men's clothing should come in big and short sizes, not just big and tall. Big and Short! Big and Short! #notallfatmenaretall I'm sure no woman would object to the urgency with which I implore you to address this.

Look, I have a VAGINA so I know a thing or two about what WOMEN care about, and it's having better underwear options for packing and binding in big box stores. #believevaginas

I REJECT the insinuation that these are just my idiosyncratic pet peeves as a trans man that I'm dressing up in the language of women's rights for attention. What part of I HAVE A VAGINA did you not understand, haters? #notallfatmenaretall

I'll stop speaking for women when you surgically attach a dick to my body, and NOT ONE MOMENT SOONER! Oh, which reminds me, I think I speak for all women when I say MORE RESEARCH DOLLARS FOR TRANS MALE PENIS SURGERY!